Maid Service?
by ImThatRumour
Summary: Living the rich life of the pretty boy actor, there is nothing that Edward Cullen wants for, he can have it all. All except perhaps, the maid? AH Disclaimer- Names and couplings to Stephanie Meyer
1. Poor little rich boy

**Maid Service**

**Prologue**

**As I slumped through the door, desperate for my bed I noticed something was different, someone was here. This was my personal space, I brought nobody back here apart from my family and closest friends and I knew it was none of them, even as I stood there the soft subtle **

**scent of strawberries and vanilla permeated my nostrils, surely not the usual scent of a burglar or murderer? I shut the door behind me as quietly as I could, not wanting to give whoever was here the chance to acknowledge my presence. As I slunk through my penthouse, my **

**heart racing as I started picturing who was here and what was going to happen to me, I saw a soft glow coming from my lounge. I crept to the door and slid through it, at first glance nobody was there but as I stood, observing the room, the soft, gentle sound of someone **

**breathing deeply came to my ears. Walking silently behind the red cord sofa I peered over. The breathing was coming from a girl, her dark chestnut curls framing her face and flowing to halfway down her back, thick, black, dusky lashes brushed her cheek as she lay sleeping, **

**a soft pink blush lighting up her face as her pink rosebud lips lifted into a peaceful, contented smile. I followed her body down, surprised at myself for spending so long gazing at her face when I usually would have gone straight for tits and ass. She was petite and slim, long **

**graceful supple limbs coupled with a beautiful hourglass figure, her arms clutched to her chest in a protective pose, the swell of her breast protruding from above her flat stomach and tiny waist, leading down to her shapely, pert ass. She was magnificent, she was in my **

**forbidden place and she was wearing...a maids outfit?**

**I cleared my throat and she slowly awoke, looking up at me with deep, beautiful dark chestnut eyes, her look fearful as I came out with "Who the hell are you?".**

**And so it begins**

Pacing the oak floors of his stately manor house he waited impatiently for the phone to ring. After traipsing around each floor he resigned himself to the fact that it wasn't going to happen any time soon and wandered into his bedroom remembering one of his mother's favourite sayings;

"a watched pot never boils".

Leaning casually against the window frame he looked contentedly out to the huge expanse of land that surrounded him, smug in the knowledge that he owned it all. Beautiful gardens bursting with colour and fragrance, a forest of different trees rolling up a hillside, the setting sun

creating an ethereal glow amongst the golden and amber autumnal leaves, setting the sky on fire and causing the lake to shimmer in the twilight, the slight breeze causing a ripple to break the surface and dislodge the water lilies that were amassing there.

He turned back to be faced with a far less pleasing sight; the bed unmade, the silken sheets rumpled, the pillows cast off the four poster bed and the hangings pulled down from where he'd try to pull back and put distance between them. The smell of sweat and sex still lingered in the air.

Last nights conquest had left a lot to be desired and he was regretting the choice to allow her back into his bed which she'd frequented too much he reckoned, she had been around too long. After all, he had a reputation to maintain, he chuckled darkly to himself, these people just don't

know how hard it is to be a professional actor and the most notorious playboy England has ever seen.

He turned away from the bed he kept just for sex in disgust. It was the only room he ever brought his women to, the only house in fact. Situated just outside London it was perfect to bring women back to without attracting too much media attention and also it meant that they couldn't

come turning up at his city penthouse, where he spent most of his time, begging for another ride.

Deciding to make his way to the library, he was just about to leave the room when the shrill ring of the phone finally broke the silence. Deciding to play it cool, he waited a few seconds, letting it ring before he sauntered over and picked it up, an irritating, nasal voice on the other end

purred "Edward?"

Sighing, just wanting this over with I replied "Tanya, I don't want you anymore" and hung up.

Damn! I should have probably handled that better, she's gonna bite my ass of at work tomorrow.


	2. Sorry I'm not plastic

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**Bpov**

There was no getting around the fact that I was nervous. I was desperately trying to appear cool,

calm and collected but on the inside I felt sick and on the outside I was visibly shaking. Don't get

me wrong, I've done plenty of interviews before and they've been fine. Sure, they can be a little

nerve racking but I always put on my best smile and present myself properly. I wasn't scare for this

interview was I? No I couldn't be. I thought back to when I'd got the phone call telling me my CV

had been accepted and inviting me to attend the interviews. I hadn't known at that point who I

would be working for, all I'd heard was that it would be some rich bachelor in London who wanted

a traditional maid. Imagine that? All this fuss with Cv's and interviews was effectively so I could be

someone's cleaner! Id woken up this morning feeling a little shaky but quietly confident. I knew I

was good at what I did. Now I'm here at the interview things have changed slightly. I felt sick and

I'm pretty sure it wasn't because of the nerves and I was terrified of humiliating myself in front of

my prospective future employer, that was it, I was definatley feeling sick, it wasn't that I was being

interviewed for a job as EDWARD CULLEN'S maid, THE Edward Cullen, the movie star every

woman wants and every man wants to be! Me? Starstruck? Not at all!

The waiting room was full of other women I noticed, there was not a man in sight. The women all

seemed to follow a certain pattern as well. They were all blonde, all over 5ft 8 with huge boobs,

tight clothing and lots of makeup piled on, and as far as I could tell from the bits of converstion they

were all VERY shallow, complaining in high, shrill voices about broken nails and wondering aloud

if they should open just one more shirt button to try and impress 'Edward'. Everytime I heard

someone say his name it was in a sickly, simpering voice, they practically fawned over him.

Although I admit he was incredibly handsome in his films, this would be a proffesional arrangement

and to me his was simply Mr Cullen.

I looked down at myself feeling very inadequate. All these women were beautiful and here I was,

plain little Bella Swan standing at 5 ft 2 with boring brown hair and brown eyes in a cream silk

blouse, Black pencil skirt and patent ballet pumps, trying to look as proffesional as possible. I

couldn't compete with these women.

As I walked into the room in which the interviews were taking place however, I relaxed a little. The

lighting was pleasant, not too bright but soothing, the décor was stunning, it was clearly someone's

office but the entire room had the air of a stately home about it, decked out with polished marble

and wood with intricate patterns carved in, a thick, plush sand coloured carpet and heavy, deep ruby,

velvet curtains framing a spectacular view.

I heard somebody cough subtly an turned to the desk, embarrassed already been slightly

overwhelmed by the beauty of the room and ignoring the men sat at the desk. I breathed in the

heady scent of orange blossom and turned to look at them, feeling the blush creeping into my

cheeks.

There were two men sat at the desk and they were both beautiful, the first was broad and muscular

with thick, dark curls caressing his forehead and smiling dark eyes. The second was blonde with

wisps of hair creating kiss curls just under his ears and sparkling blue eyes. They both greeted me

with a smile and the second of the two welcomed me with a thick Texan drawl

"Now hello there ma'am would you care to take a seat and we'll begin. My name is Jasper Whitlock

and this is my associate, Emmett Cullen"

I took the seat that his hand directed me too feeling inscesed. Edward Cullen wasn't there! Did he

think that just because he was a film star he didn't have to act civil and greet people who may turn

out to be his future employees? That was just common day politeness!

Bastard.


	3. Defence of the one eyed trouser snake

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**Epov**

I was right.

Tanya's been a bitch all day. At first she just wouldn't leave me alone, she was all over me at every

opportunity she got, perching on my knee with her bony ass and raking her fake red nails through

my hair scratching my scalp until I unceremoniously threw her off my lap and stalked off to try and

get the scene we were filming over and done with. God, whoever came up with the analogy that

your leading lady was perfect was a fucking idiot! As we started the shoot, Tanya seemed to have

calmed down a little. However, when we got to the sex scene I'd been dreading all hell broke loose.

I was supposed to be teasing her, I held her arms together behind her as I kissed down her neck,

nipping at her collarbone and palming her big, fake tits, my dick going flaccid just at the touch but

then I was supposed to twirl around, pull her into me and give her a deep, lingering kiss. Well I tried

an the fucking bitch attacked me! Pinned me down with her legs and tried to pull my dick out in

front of everyone, claiming that only she could fulfil my desires in a high, nasal scream! Well I

went mad, pushed her away and tried to escape to my trailer feeling fury and embarrassment fill me.

But even then the bloody woman followed me!

" Eddie, come back darling, let Tanz make it up to you, I'll do that thing you like, you know the one

where I use my teeth"

She tried to wink coyly at me but it didn't work, her fake voice wasn't sexy, it was painful I tried to

reply to her as kindly as possible

"Tanya, you haven't done anything wrong although that last act was someone public and

unexpected, and so there is nothing you need to make up for. As I told you last night, I simply don't

think we should be together amymore"

She looked shocked but then pulled herself together again and started,

"Don't be silly Eddie you know you need me, you want me, I'm your little baby girl remember?"

she simpered.

God she just wouldn't give up would she? This was really getting on my nerves now.

"Tanya, I neither want you nor need you, you are not my mother, nor am I your father which means

you are not as you so eloquently put it, 'my little baby girl', oh and just so you know, I hate it when

you use your teeth, who want a girl to bite his dick? Those moans you heard were not of pleasure

they were of intense pain and the reason I made you leave so quickly is so I could out ice on my

dick. Thank you and good day"

I finished with a flourish an slammed my trailer door in her face. God, I couldn't believe I'd ever

willingly slept with her, even if it was just for a bit of pussy.

**Bpov**

The interview went well I think. I gathered myself together after my initial flash of fury at the cheek

of that man not even being here though he had the audacity to demand all sorts of things! The

demands were thrust upon me as well at the last minute.

Id sat down and introduced myself and complimented them on the room, they both smiled ad the

blonde one, Jasper said his girlfriend, Alice, had decorated it and he'd be sure to pass on the

compliments. I said she had exquisite taste and must be a wonderful woman and Jasper smiled some

more and agreed with me as Emmett turned to him and hit him on the arm whilst claiming his sister

had made him pussy whipped. I chuckled to myself and felt far more at ease, we spent the entire

interview joking with each other and the guys started teasing me about why I wanted to work for

their esteemed Edward, pretending I had ulterior motives. It wasn't until I was just about to leave

that Emmett called me back a second and said there were just one or two things he had to run by me

to check I was aright with them. Firstly, I would be his live in house keeper of sorts, looking after

him and attending to problems he had.

Well this wasn't too bad and I couldn't disagree because if I didn't get this job I'd have to give up

my flat anyway and then I'd be homeless.

The second request was a little different however. During working hours I would be required to

wear a French maids outfit.

I blanched a little at the thought of this, wondering whether Edward had some kind of fetish but

then I pulled myself together and agreed to the terms.

After all, I needed this job.


	4. Leaving home, all grown up

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**Bpov**

I didn't get it.

At least I don't think I did.

It had been three weeks since the interview and I'd heard nothing, not even a 'sorry you don't make

the grade' and I was thoroughly pissed off. I'd studied the media avidly every morning to see if it

had been mentioned that Mr Cullen had got a new member of staff, he was incredibly famous so

that kinda news might be there right? But so far I'd seen nothing. The only thing about Mr Cullen in

the media was his incredibly public breakup with his current leading lady, Tanya Denali. Suffice to

say she fitted the image of every girl in that waiting room – tall, blonde and big tits so I guess the

job must have gone to one of them.

As I was moping round, wondering if would have to move back in with my dad, Charlie, the phone

rang. Figuring it was my best friend Rosalie I let it ring a few times, confidant that she'd stay on the

line while I got my head together and managed to manoeuvre my way around all the boxes that

were everywhere, boxes containing all my things, I got to the phone and picked it up.

Without having given her a chance to talk I had embarked on telling her all my current woes from

the fact that my lease was up and I was having to move out of my flat with nowhere to go, to that I

hadn't got the job and it was useless because I was probably never going to get a job ever again but

it was ok because it was clear that Edward Cullen was definitely a dick because he didn't even turn

up to interview his own staff when a voice cut through my ramblings.

A deep smooth voice.

A male voice...

"Miss Swan? Is that you? Isabella?"

uh oh, I replied with "it's just Bella thanks, who's this?"

and then immediately reprimanded myself, after all, this could be some crazy stalker on the line and

I'd just given him my name.

"Hey, Bella it's Emmett Cullen"

I breathed a sigh of relief and then remembered what this call must be about and was filled with

trepidation.

"Bella, are you still up for this job with my brother?"

"Yes definitely" I exclaimed, thanking God I didn't have to move back in with Charlie. I mean I

loved him and all but I was 24!

"Great, Jasper says if you want to come over to his place now then Alice will kit you up with your

uniform and you can start today"

I cringed a little at the thought of the uniform but i'd already resigned myself to the fact that it was

something I'd have to put up with

"Ok" I stammered

"Great, I'll send a car to your flat straight away to pick you up, it's still the same address as the one

on your application isn't it?"

"Yep" I said, looking around me at al the junk and then down at myself in my sweats with my hair

tied back off my face and wondering if I had time to clean myself up

"Great, then il see you in half an hour" Emmett said and with that he put down the phone.

I knew straight away I had to ring Rose and get her round and sure enough, five minutes later she

turned up from the flat across the street.

Filling her in with everything that had just happened I sat down on one of the boxes, shaken and not

knowing what to do.

Rose pulled me back up an set me straight.

"First things first, you get that cute little butt of yours in the shower while I find you some decent

clothes"

Following these instructions I wandered numbly into the shower thinking about how my life had

turned around in the space of five minutes. I was going to live in someone else's house and be their

servant. What if they wouldn't let me see my family? Or Rosalie? Why did I even ever apply for this

job?

Standing under the stream of hot water I pondered all of this whilst rubbing myself clean and

scenting myself with the scent of strawberry shower gel.

As I came out of the shower I shared all these thoughts with Rose

"Don't be ridiculous" she scoffed at me, "As if anyone could stop me seeing you if I wanted to"

I smiled quietly to myself, agreeing with her. Rosie may be a part time make-up artist but she was

also a part time mechanic and no body had ever been able to control her in any way.

As I dressed in the clothes Rose had picked out, a short black skirt with a pink and white, billowy

chiffon top and black ballet pumps I heard the door bell ring. I called out to Rose to get it while I

put the finishing touches to my subtle make-up and blow dried my hair.

I heard the door open and a guy's voice greeting Rose and then I heard something i'd never heard

before. Rose was practically simpering, I went to see what was happening and saw Emmett and

Rose shaking hands.

"Umm yeh Rose this is Emmett Cullen, Emmett, this is my best friend Rosalie"

"Mmm, Rosalie, a beautiful name for a beautiful girl" Emmett charmed as Rose giggled.

And then

"Bella love, you'll never be able to take all this stuff to Edwards', why don't I stay here with Rosalie

and help put your things into storage while she picks out some of your favourite things to take with

you?" Emmett suggested

without giving me chance to agree, he took me out to the black limo awaiting me and closed the

door with a final sentence

"Bella, be careful of Edward. Don't take any of his shit."


	5. Classy hooker

**Hey guys, now this is the last time I'm going to submit anymore chapters unless I get some more reviews coming in. 325 hits in a couple of hours isn't bad, I need to know what you think of it if I'm to continue with the story. The first 10 people to review will get a preview of the next chapter which will be the first meeting!**

**Bpov**

As the car glided smoothly away from my block of flats a sense of fear mixed with, dare I admit it, a tingle of excitement flooded through me at Emmett's parting words. I had seen Mr Cullen plenty of times on the big screen

but after all, that wasn't really him was it?

Maybe he had a different side to him that the people didn't see?

I chastised myself immediately for this thought.

Idiot Bella, of course he has a different side to him off screen. He's a whole different person for God's sake!

This thought seemed to worry me even more. I was now seemingly journeying into the unknown and the sense of excitement in me died away as it was fully replaced with fear.

I shouldn't have worried though, as the car pulled up outside a gorgeous four storey Victorian town house, the door was flung open and a tirade of noise and laughter hit me as I was bundled out into the arms of a tiny,

beautiful woman.

I saw Jasper out of the corner of my eye chuckling and gave him a tiny wry smile as I realised this must be Alice.

She truly was exquisite to look at, tiny yet perfectly formed with big twinkly eyes and dark black hair set in kiss curls around her heart shaped face.

She hugged me to her crying

"I'm so glad to meet you! Jazz and Em have hardly shut up since they met you, you really are as lovely as they said you were and so beautiful!I just know were going to be the best of friends!"

"Alice, baby, give her some space to breathe!" chastised Jasper jokingly as I shot him a grateful smile.

I couldn't help but be taken in by this vivacious little pixie and found myself grinning as she pulled me into the house and upstairs so she could make me over.

Alice told me all about how she was a fashion designer which is why her brothers and Jazz looked so good she claimed.

She wouldn't allow me to look in a mirror as she fixed my face, muttering all about how good things come to those who wait whilst Jasper looked on adoringly.

She and Jasper both chatted easily to me throughout, wanting to know everything about me, what my favourite things were and what I looked for in a guy!

"After all," Alice said, "we're family now, you're just going to be like a new sister to me even if you do have to look after my hideous big brother"

"Big" I responded looking confused

Jasper smirked having intentionally taken my confusion the wrong way and winked at me

"Jazz!" Alice chastised him, hitting him on the arm "Just ignore him Bella, all men are children. I'm 22, Edward is 25 as is Jazz here although you'd never guess the way he behaves and Emmett is 26 so I'm the youngest of the

family"

Throughout this whole exchange she'd been perfecting my make-up and now she turned me around to face the mirror.

Looking at the reflection I almost didn't recognise me at first, where was plain, boring Bella gone?

Here she'd been replaced with a classic beauty, all peaches and cream skin, big soulful dark eyes with thick Black lashes framing them and thick, wavy chestnut hair falling around my face

"I've put all the make-up and hair products I've used in a bag for you with instructions on how to use them" offered Alice "and I found out your measurements from Jazz when I first found out you'd got the job so I've filled

your closet in Edwards house with new things for you to wear, I hope you don't mind"

I just nodded, still in a state of confusion about how exactly Jasper had managed to get my measurements when Alice pushed a clothes bag into my hand

"and this is your uniform, I've altered it a bit" she said awkwardly

To much protesting from Jasper, we pushed him out of the room whilst I tried on my uniform.

When it was on however I quite like it even though I mentally told myself I'd never admit it to anyone.

Alice had altered it so it looked classy as opposed to slutty, the hem line falling just above my knee, the frothy white apron cutting it as a belt giving me a perfect silhouette.

I thanked her as she checked the time and exclaimed

"Oh God you've got to go, I promised Em I'd get you there before Edward got back"

And with that she led me back out to the limo still patiently waiting outside.

We both hugged and she promised she'd come and see me as soon as she could, Jasper held the car door open for me and kissed me on the cheek.

Just as he was about to close the door, Alice called out

"Bella, be careful of Edward, he might be my brother but that doesn't stop him being a dick"

I thought about this on the car journey to my future.

Twice in a day i'd been warned about this man, what exactly was his problem?

I dozed off into a fitful sleep and finally awoke just as we were pulling up to a beautiful glass building.

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	6. Eye on the gay guy

**Hey guys :)**

**I know I said that they would meet in this chapter but there was just so much more to say so I'm sorry! But it will be the next one I promise :)**

**Well, over 600 hits in what night seems pretty good to me so thanks for that.**

**Please keep reviewing, if I think nobody likes the story then I just won't continue it.**

**Bpov**

Well this was it.

No turning back now.

I stood at the bottom of the building looking up, realising the only things I currently had to my name were a maids outfit and a handbag.

I turned and smiled to thank the driver, Benjamin, as he waved me goodbye and slid away into the cool evening.

I looked at my phone and saw it was already seven, I was glad Alice had thought to feed me up before I got here otherwise I would have been starving tonight, not knowing where anything was.

On the other hand maybe the carrot and coriander soup she had served me had been a bad idea after all, I could feel my stomach churning and I'm pretty sure it wasn't just nerves.

Maybe the slight illness I'd felt at the interview was pre emptive

I was definitely sickening.

But, it couldn't be helped, I had a job to do and I'll be damned if I wasn't going to do it right.

I braced myself and turned towards the huge glass doors surrounded by gold gilt, into the building.

The doorman introduced himself as James and held the door open for me as he ushered me inside to the warmth from the cool night.

"Can't have a pretty little lady like you catching a chill now can we?" he said as I smiled and blushed, "Hey I'm Bella, do you think you could help me? I'm looking for Mr Cullen's residence, I'm his new maid" I replied in a friendly voice.

After all it didn't hurt to make friends who look like they could watch your back, and James _definitely_ looked like he could watch my back, tall an broad with rippling biceps, prominent even through his official doormans coat, he was pretty hot with his bright blue eyes, spiked blonde hair and cute little dimple.

He laughed and I swear I heard him mutter everybody ought to have a maid to himself before beckoning me to him and taking my arm.

"Seeing as you're clearly a special little lady I'll escort you up to his apartment myself" he said with a wink.

I felt myself blushing and then tripped over my feet and would have ended up sprawled all over the floor if James hadn't caught me in time.

"Looks like I was right about the 'special' bit then" he chuckled as he stood me upright.

I grinned at him and then another thought hit me,

"James, what's wrong with Mr Cullen? People keep telling me to be careful of him."

James looked awkward for a minute and then started to speak very slowly and carefully as if he was planning his words out,

"Bella, Mr Cullen is...well he's kinda, no, the best way to say this is that Edward Cullen is a man slag, he can have a new woman every night if he wants them and he picks them up and throws them away like a piece of trash. I think these people are scared the same thing will happen to you, but don't worry little Bella. You look like you've got a smart head on your shoulders and i'll keep an eye out for you"

"Thanks James" I replied with an easy smile, suddenly feeling more comfortable with the whole situation.

"Here's your stop then little miss" James said as he deposited me at an solid oak door with a gold plaque saying _Cullen_ on it "I'll be downstairs whenever you need me or you can call me on this number if it's a general problem" he said as he took my phone and programmed his name and number into it, " or this number if you spot any fit young men who look like they could use a bit of this" and he gestured to his body whilst programming the other number into my phone and labelling it '_gaydar' _and with that he kissed me on both cheeks and set off back downstairs in the elevator.

Great, I chuckled to myself wryly. The first hot, single guy I meet and he's gay.

**Epov**

Well I don't think anyone could have had a worse day than I'd just had.

I was knackered for one, having to have re filmed all the scenes Tanya mucked up with her crazy attack on my dick

and let me tell you, it wasn't easy trying to shoot a sex scene when your other half is a sulky bitch AND you're trying to guard your dick with one hand while trying to feign intimacy with the other!

After that I had to do various interviews not only promoting the film but trying to defend myself when a bunch of crazy feminists started yelling abuse at me saying I was using and abusing the female form for my own selfish gains.

Well of course I was!

Finally I ended up with a phone call from my brother, Emmett, saying there was a surprise waiting for me and home and then ringing off straight away before I could question him!

Deciding I wouldn't bother thinking of Em I made my way home, concentrating solely on the bottle of Jack I knew was open in my liquor cabinet.

Greeting the doorman James I made my way into the lift and briefly wondered what the strange little smile he'd just given me was all about?

He wasn't coming on to me was he?

I mean, I knew he was as gay as the daisies in May but I always thought me and him were pretty cool with that...

Putting it to the back of my mind I stepped out of the lift and towards my front door, getting my key ready to unlock it and push it open...

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	7. Manchild

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**Bpov**

I fished out the key Alice had given me earlier and pushed it into the door, hearing the satisfying click as it unlocked the mechanism.

Slipping the key back into my handbag, I pushed forward on the door and entered the apartment where I would be living for an undetermined amount of time.

It was actually kinda beautiful in an old English gentleman meets modern bachelor kinda way.

The first room I'd walked into was an open plan living room and kitchen.

It typical male manner, a massive TV stood in the corner surrounded by what looked like every games console imaginable.

A couple of soft mahogany leather recliners stood either side of a massive cord sofa cover in cushions.

The focal point of the room however was a beautiful ornate fireplace with carved marble surrounding it and a poinsettia stood either side giving it a homely, albeit slightly christmasy feel.

I wandered through to the kitchen, taking in the smooth, black granite worktops and the polished oak cupboards.

Deciding it would be best to acquaint myself with the rest of the house before my new employer got home, I continued down the corridor.

A bathroom stood at the farthest end complete with en suite wet room and a massive, jacuzzi style bath.

I grinned to myself, from what I had seen so far, everything seemed overly big, maybe Mr Cullen was trying to compensate for something.

Following on from the bathroom there was a library with yet another ornate fireplace and very soft, dim lighting, giving it an old worldly feel.

Next to this was what could only be described as a boy's room.

A pool table stood in the middle, while an re-fillable party keg sat in the corner and video games and DVDs were scattered all over the place.

I kept looking, secretly searching for his bedroom, I wasn't going to lie and say I'd never dreamt about him kissing me between the sheets,

I mean what self respecting woman hasn't?

After encountering a locked door that I'd made a mental note to find out what was inside, I found it.

His room.

It was actually, dare I say it, kinda cute.

A massive king sized bed was placed in the centre with a brown velvet comforter and a walk in wardrobe.

The room was lit by a chandelier lamp with red and clear crystals reflecting off the walls and a picture of what I assumed must be his family was placed on a dresser along with a couple of comic books and a tattered teddy bear.

I smiled to my self again, Edward Cullen, world famous actor and heartthrob, was a nerd.

I found what must be my room across the hall.

It was pleasant enough and I was sure I could make it more homely.

I decided to go back to the lounge and wait for Mr Cullen to come home.

Sitting down on the sofa I started to feel a little ill again.

Hmm, maybe I'll just lie down for a minute or two...

**Epov**

As I slumped through the door, desperate for my bed I noticed something was different, someone was here.

This was my personal space, I brought nobody back here apart from my family and closest friends and I knew it was none of them,

even as I stood there the soft subtle scent of strawberries and vanilla permeated my nostrils, surely not the usual scent of a burglar or murderer?

I shut the door behind me as quietly as I could, not wanting to give whoever was here the chance to acknowledge my presence.

As I slunk through my penthouse, my heart racing as I started picturing who was here and what was going to happen to me,

I saw a soft glow coming from my lounge.

I crept to the door and slid through it, at first glance nobody was there but as I stood, observing the room, the soft, gentle sound of someone breathing deeply came to my ears.

Walking silently behind the red cord sofa I peered over.

The breathing was coming from a girl, her dark chestnut curls framing her face and flowing to halfway down her back,

thick, black, dusky lashes brushed her cheek as she lay sleeping, a soft pink blush lighting up her face as her pink rosebud lips lifted into a peaceful, contented smile.

I followed her body down, surprised at myself for spending so long gazing at her face when I usually would have gone straight for tits and ass.

She was petite and slim, long graceful supple limbs coupled with a beautiful hourglass figure,

her arms clutched to her chest in a protective pose, the swell of her breast protruding from above her flat stomach and tiny waist, leading down to her shapely, pert ass.

She was magnificent, she was in my forbidden place and she was wearing...a maids outfit?

I cleared my throat and she slowly awoke, looking up at me with deep, beautiful dark chestnut eyes, her look fearful as I came out with

"Who the hell are you?".

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	8. There's a hooker on my sofa, explain?

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**This chapter is dedicated to Miss T for being so helpful with her review ;) thanks hun.**

**Bpov**

Eurgh

My head hurt.

I was right I really was ill.

And I could hear somebody moving about.

Oh my god! This is it!

Someone's broken into my apartment and they're going to kill me!

And I'm ill to boot!

What a way to go...

But...

this wasn't my apartment, it smelled different and the sofa I was laying on was waaay to comfortable to be mine.

And then it hit me

I remembered where I was.

In Edward Cullen's apartment to be precise, my new employer which meant...

OMG! The person I could hear moving around must be him!

And I'm just laying here like an idiot.

On his sofa.

I feel so stupid.

I opened my eyes slowly, scared of what would meet me and then a vision of a God came into focus before me.

Edward Cullen was beautiful.

A million time better in real life than on the big screen.

Standing at what must have been about 6ft 2, he leant over me, intense, deep green eyes flashing with what looked like bewilderment, tousled dark bronze hair and a perfectly sculpted face with a strong jaw line lightly dusted with just the right amount of stubble.

He looked beautiful, but exhausted,

and then he spoke, that rich, velvety voice penetrating the air, enough to make my panties wet,

"Who the hell are you?"

I took one last look at him,

let out what can only be described as a pathetic mewl,

the pounding in my head getting stronger and the feeling of sickness intensifying...

and then I fainted back onto the sofa in front of him.

**Epov**

The fuck was going on here?

I'd come home to find some chick in my space,

I mean albeit she was hot and all but it was MY SPACE!

No one comes here!

Then it clicked and I remembered what Emmett had said on the phone earlier.

I had a 'surprise' waiting for me back at the apartment.

I got on the phone to him as quick as I could and started shouting as soon as he picked up

"DICK!"

"What's up bro" I heard him chuckling down the other end of the line

"Don't bro me you dick! Care to explain why there's some chick dressed up as some cheap hooker at my apartment?"

"Dude! That's not some chick that's Bella and she's a fucking sweetheart not some hooker!" Em started yelling

"Then why's she dressed up as a maid then?" I yelled back

"Cause that's what you said you wanted dickwad! When we suggested you get a house keeper at your apartment cause you never keep it clean and Alice and mum just about do their nut every time they go there, you started going on about how you wanted a young woman who wore a maid's outfit! Well here's your young woman and she's in her outfit!" Em was full out bellowing now

"That was just a fantasy you dick! I didn't expect it to become real!"

"Well it has Edward so get used to it and start treating her nice! What must she be thinking at the moment when she hears you shouting all this shit?"

"She's thinking nothing cause she fainted on the sofa about ten minutes ago" I came back with

" She what?" Emmett yelled, "Edward you dick!"

and with that the bastard put the phone down on me!

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	9. Silence is electric

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**Epov**

Sighing, I put the handset down and wondered what to do.

I felt I should probably go and check on this woman.

Bella.

A fucking sweetheart, Em had said,

well I can see that,

she was truly something special to look at.

I went and got a glass of water and took it to her, ready to throw it over her too wake her up like they do in the films I'm in.

And then I had second thoughts,

after all it probably wasn't this girl's fault she'd been coerced into this.

Not Bella's fault.

But then I felt angry again,

even if it wasn't her fault for thinking of the idea she'd applied for the job,

she was the one who had been snooping around my apartment,

and she was the on who was now, thoughtlessly passed out on my sofa when I wanted to slump down and relax,

On. My. Own.

Leaning over the back of the sofa I started to pat her face,

not too hard, as I really did feel bad for her if she was ill,

but hard enough to wake her up.

She looked pure, innocent even.

I let my hand rest against her cheek and softly rubbed it.

She let out a little murmur and suddenly her hand shot up and she grabbed onto my fingers,

pulling them away from her face.

Her big, brown eyes looked up at me beseechingly,

full of confusion,

probably wondering why I was hitting her...

Oh shit!

I _was _hitting her

a complete stranger!

Now I feel like a dick,

I should have probably just rung an ambulance or something.

**Bpov**

I could feel something swatting at my face,

it kinda hurt,

repeatedly hitting me albeit it gently.

Then I realised it was someone's hand,

I could feel the rough, calloused skin brushing against my soft cheek,

gentle, caressing,

but who?

I grabbed onto the fingers and pulled them away,

opening my eyes to see Edward,

his face full of concern,

and, was it possible,

a trace of guilt?

We both stayed still for a few moments,

neither one of us knew what to say,

after all he'd just been caressing my face,

and I was laid out before him,

like a harlot on a silver platter!

He grasped my hand in his and started to make a motion as if he was going to pull me up,

the closeness of our bodies suggested a kind of intimacy that was thoroughly inappropriate for staff and employees,

as well as for people who had only just met.

Silent, unspoken, the tension between was electric,

and then we both froze as we heard a clattering and banging coming up the stairs,

a cry of "Bells, I'm coming" could be heard

and then the door slammed open.

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	10. Drama Queen?

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**Epov**

Emmett came crashing through the door closely followed by Alice.

"Bells! You alright girl?"

then he turned to me and said

"Dick! Why didn't you ring a fucking ambulance or something? She could have been seriously ill!"

and with that he pulled my hand away from Bella's and scooped her up, placing her on his lap

Shit, i'd never seen Em act so crazy protective over someone before.

And I didn't like it.

Something stirred deep in the pit of my stomach,

could it be...jealousy?

Bella was mine now.

She was my property whether I liked it or not,

Emmett had more or less said so himself

and yet here he was, touching MY property!

I could feel a growl rising in my chest which I didn't really understand.

Why was I so pissed?

It wasn't like I even liked this chick!

Luckily for me, at that moment my best mate Jazz walked in, followed by a hot blonde in ridiculously high heels which explained why they were a little behind Alice and Emmett.

"Emmett, stop being a drama queen, Bella is fine arn't you hun?" Jazz said

Bella replied with a nod of the head and a shaky smile

Bells? Hun? How close were they to her?

They seemed to be treating her as a kid sister,

they must have really gotten off well at the interview.

Yet again, a pang of jealousy stirred inside me.

"Queen?" Emmett cried out, looking affronted " I ain't no fucking queen mate!"

"Shh honey" the hot blonde chided, " I think Jasper is trying to say you're perhaps overreacting a little, Bella's my best friend and I can see from here that she's okay, you're just all crowding her too much"

Ahh this must be Emmett's latest conquest, and seemingly Bella's best friend as well.

Well that might be awkward well Emmett leaves her, as he tends to, after sex.

But he was giving me a funny look, attempting ,I think, to put across a message saying 'she's mine, don't touch'

Hmm, I mused to myself. Maybe this one would be different, she seems to already have his balls in her handbag.

I was broken out of my musings by Alice smacking me across the chest, boy for a small woman she could certainly pack a punch,

"Do not mistreat my new best friend again!"

Shit, what had I gotten myself in for here?

**Bpov**

Emmett came bounding through the door, practically tearing me away from Edward's grip.

I blushed as I thought of him finding us in any sort of physical contact after his warning.

Alice raced through behind him and after giving me an appraising look she quirked an eyebrow, silently questioning my well being.

I nodded and she seemed satisfied enough and turned away to spare me my blushes.

Edward and Emmett seemed to be having some sort of argument which I hadn't yet tuned in to.

I just continued to sit there until Jasper and Rose came through the door.

Jasper gave me a little wink and then went to stand behind his girlfriend, enveloping her in his arms.

Rose followed suit of Alice's actions and after checking I was okay, cut into Edward and Emmett's argument and suggested they give me a little space.

I smiled gratefully at her but soon blanched again upon hearing Emmett's demand that he carry me to bed in case I collapse.

However, at Rose's nod I went with it and allowed myself to be picked up by the great hulking giant, who had a surprisingly gentle touch, and carried to the bedroom where I would be sleeping.

After laying me down on the bed and whispering goodnight Emmett left, closing the door behind him.

I lay on the bed with my eyes closed, listening to the hum of a whispered argument outside my door but soon enough the noise stopped,

and black enveloped me once more.

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	11. Please Sir

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**Bpov**

I woke up the next morning and felt a sense of unfamiliarity creep over me again.

I lay there for a few moments weighing up the different places I could be,

until I remembered once again that I was at Edward's house.

The memory of last night's events suddenly hit me an I groaned with embarrassment as I remembered passing out on the sofa and Emmett's dramatics.

It was a cool, breezy morning.

Light was shining in from the big, bay window and reflecting of the mirror on the opposite wall,

filling the room with an iridescent glow.

I clambered out of bed, stretched and looked down to see I was still wearing my maid's uniform.

Damn! I didn't actually have any other clothes with me!

I went searching through the cupboards and drawers for the clothes Alice had promised me and found nothing.

Hearing a banging and clattering coming from the kitchen I decided the best thing to do was probably face my fears and walk out there to meet my new employer.

Maybe he could help me with my clothes situation.

Wandering into the kitchen, I saw him stood with his back to me eating a bowl of cereal.

He was topless.

I cleared my throat to let him know I was here and he turned around.

He was absolutly beautiful,

perfectly sculpted muscles,

obviously defined and very lean

with a trail of hair leading down to a promising place...

"Good morning sir" I said in the cheeriest voice I could muster trying no to ogle his body at the same time.

"There's not much good about it is there?" he replied sneeringly, looking me up and down, taking in the maid's outfit and my whole dishevelled look.

At that moment my stomach decided to intensify the awkward situation by growling.

Noticing this, Edward turned to me and said "there's food over there, sort it yourself" in such a rude, displeased tone that I felt myself flush bright red and scuttled off, hanging my head both in anger and shame.

**Epov**

What the hell was I going to do about this situation?

Nothing, that was the answer cause I had no idea what to do.

It was true, I could use someone round the house to help keep it tidy,

and Em had said she'd be able to help with press problems too so that was an added bonus.

Maybe I could get Em to let her live with him and then just use her when I needed her.

No, that made her my whore and I didn't want that.

Or did I?

I wandered moodily into the kitchen, catching sight of myself in the mirror as I passed and smirking.

I knew I looked good.

Even with messy bed hair and dark circles under my eyes I looked good.

I rubbed my stubble self consciously however, and continued on to the kitchen.

I'd just started eating favourite cereal (Lucky charms, whoever thought of mixing marshmallows with cereal should be knighted!) when I heard a little cough.

I turned to see Bella standing there.

Fuck.

She was beautiful.

Still in her maid's outfit, cutting her a beautiful silhouette and hugging her curves,

hair a mess of curls cascading down her back and dark bags under her eyes, making them look like dark smudges on her lovely face.

"Good morning sir" she came out with

Shit! 'Sir', I could get used to that.

I imagined her on her knees begging me and calling me sir and then quickly shook the image away.

"There's not much good about it is there?" I replied, somewhat ruder than I had intended and instantly felt bad.

It wasn't really her fault after all was it?

Her stomach rumbled suddenly so I pointed her in the direction of the food and then left to get showered.

A while later she came to find me asking if she could have a shower.

I felt bad again, why should anyone have to ask for something so trivial?

I was finding it increasingly difficult to talk to her so I just pointed to the shower and let her get on with it.

What I wasn't prepared for however, was for her to come out about 10 minutes later dripping wet and wrapped only in a towel.

She really was stunning.

"I'm sorry" she said to me in a voice that seemed to tremble with apprehension, "But you don't have any clothes I could borrow do you? Just whilst my uniform dries out?"

Grunting I stepped into my room and found her the smallest pair of boxer shorts I owned and a sports hoodie I'd had from school with my name on the back.

Passing them over to her, she thanked me and left to get changed.

I was just about to ring Em and get him to take her to his house when she stepped out of her room.

Even in my clothes she looked gorgeous.

Long, lean bare legs and a cute ass.

The thing that really got me though was my name scrawled across her back.

Ownership.

I owned her and she was mine...

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	12. My Little Serving Girl

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**Epov**

People had been in and out all day,

I was at my wits end.

So much for this apartment being my safe haven where nobody comes!

First of all Alice turns up just after mine and Bella's 'moment' and starts having a hissy fit about the fact Bella's wearing my clothes, saying they aren't what she should be wearing at all.

Personally I thought she looked pretty damn fine in them.

Then Alice wheeled in what looked like half a clothes store and stuffed it all in Bella's wardrobe and then when she found it wouldn't fit, put it in mine!

About half an hour after that Emmett strolled in followed by his blonde.

Rosalie I think Bella said.

Anyway, he blew up at me for the completely wrong reason.

The second he saw Bella dressed in my clothes he grabbed me, pushed me against the wall,

and started shouting "You. Can. Not. Tap. That!" in my face!

He thought I'd fucked her! Already!

Out of the corner of my eye I could see the delicate blush on Bella's face rising and so to try and ease her discomfort I replied with,

"Like I would!"

(Oh I _would!)_

But that didn't work at all!

Bella's face fell, Rosalie ran to comfort her and Emmett smacked me across the face.

I'd only meant I wouldn't because she was hired help!

Although I _am _paying her...

**Bpov**

When Alice turned up I was relieved to have female company.

For all of five seconds.

She apologised profusely for not having the clothes in the wardrobe for when I needed then and chastised me for what I was wearing but then pulled me away to my room to show me what she said was her favourite part of all my outfits.

I felt I should be scared.

I was right.

In her Mary Poppin's style bag she pulled out armfuls and armfuls of underwear.

Deep, plunging, silk bras,

lacey boy pants,

thongs,

frilly baby dolls, she had the lot

AND she expected me to wear them!

Maybe she'd guessed my secret fetish after all...

A little later Emmett turned up and it all went down hill from there.

After seeing me in Edward's clothes he got the wrong idea and thought we'd slept together.

He started yelling and that was my cue to start blushing at the mere thought of Edward being interested in me.

And then Edward confirmed exactly what I'd always thought.

He wasn't interested at all and in that one moment he crushed me.

Rose came to comfort me but once again I took the easy option out and fled to my room, cheeks burning, to be saved from further humiliation, hoping they'd all take the hint and leave.

They did.

**Epov**

I honestly feel terrible about what i'd said.

After watching Bella run away I was at a loss at what to do.

I ushered Emmett, Rose and Alice out of the door with all of them hissing at me that i'd better "fix it" and then went to knock on Bella's door.

"Bella?"

"Bella can I come in?"

Silence

So I took that to mean yes.

I opened the door and walked in to see her sat staring out of the window.

The sun streaming through lit up her face and illuminated the tears running down her perfect cheeks.

Silent sobs racked her tiny body and I felt a little broken inside.

I had caused this.

"Bella, Bella I'm so sorry"

Silence

"I honestly didn't mean it"

She turned her head to look at me, her cascade of chestnut curls falling to hide part of her face, she looked vulnerable.

"It's ok sir, you haven't done anything" she whispered.

"Please Bella, call me Edward and I have done something and for what I said I'm truly sorry. You are an incredibly beautiful young lady and there is no reason why I shouldn't want you but you must see what position I was put in, you are in my employment"

Her face lit up a little at those words and I thought there might still be hope yet.

And then...

"But why did you say it Edward?" she asked sadly

I was getting frustrated now, I didn't see what I could do.

"Shit Bella I just told you! You might be hot but I can't have you, you're my fucking servant arn't you and last time I checked that doesn't make you my whore!Unless that's a position you think you're more suited to" I shouted, sarcastically.

I instantly regretted everything i'd just said, I could have hit myself.

She looked like i'd just slapped her, she was horrified.

"I'm nobody's whore _Sir_" she spat at me "Now if you'll excuse me i'll get on with my jobs as _your servant_ but other than that I am nothing to you" and she pushed me out of the door.

Pushed me out of the door in my own fucking apartment!

And what did she mean she was nothing to me?

She was still mine, I wasn't having anyone take that away from me.

_My little serving girl_

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	13. Night time lonliness

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**Epov**

We'd slipped into a kind of routine.

She proved herself so useful that all thoughts of getting Emmett to take her left my mind.

She still hadn't forgiven me though.

Every morning she'd get up at half past six.

I'd lay in bed and listen to her as she sang to herself in the shower.

It was the only time she sounded happy.

When I'd heard her get out of the shower and go into the kitchen I got up.

I always wandered into the kitchen in my grey joggers.

Call me stupid but in a way I hoped it would tempt her back to liking me again.

You're right I am stupid.

I had insulted this beautiful woman in the worst way.

Called her a whore!

She had every right to hate me.

And she was so perfect!

She always made me some kind of delicious breakfast;

waffles and fresh fruit,

pancakes,

Full English etc.

and always served it up with a smile on her face that didn't reach her eyes and a "Good morning sir."

She'd continued to call me that after our fight and wore her maid outfit also.

I cringed inwardly every time I heard her call me "sir",

remembering how I had called her my servant.

I think that's what she was trying to remind me of with the maid outfit as well and although I did feel a little bit of regret when I saw her sylph like figure clad in black velvet and white lace, the main effect it had on me was to turn me on.

After all, she looked absolutely stunning without realising it.

I don't really know what she does when I'm not with her.

She cleans the apartment I know, because I see the results but other than that I guess she just entertains herself.

Sees her friends.

Shops maybe.

But when she was with me she always kept her quiet, submissive like behaviour.

As Emmett promised she dealt with press calls for me and for that I had the utmost respect.

She didn't take any crap from anybody.

She always got the best deal out of things and refused to let people put her down.

Her quiet power and determination were contributing factors to the intense lust I felt towards her.

I'd thought about trying to seduce her, but that perfect image was put right out of my mind every time I saw her doing her job.

I'd already called her a whore,

I didn't want to make her feel like one.

**Bpov**

Things were sufficiently awkward.

So I did the only thing I could think of.

I ignored them and kept trying to do my job.

I greeted Mr Cullen every morning and served him up his breakfast.

Every time I saw him come through to the kitchen looking ruggedly handsome with his top off, his bronze hair in a wild array and a layer of dark stubble covering his chin I remembered the saying

my mother always used to tell me;

' The way to a man's heart is through his stomach'

I allowed myself to smile at the irony of this.

I wanted nothing more than this man's heart, however much of a dick he had been and I know I kept him well fed.

It was just a shame he didn't feel like giving his heart to me.

Whilst Mr Cullen wasn't at home I finished up all my other jobs like cleaning and dealing with the press and then I went out to see Alice and Jasper or Rose and Emmett.

Both Jasper and Emmett worked from home most of the time and so were always around to hang out.

Rose seemed to be spending all her time with Em these days as well and I was happy for them both, they made a beautiful couple.

Letting myself into Em's house I shouted up to him,

"Honey, I'm home"

and to no surprise Rose's call came back to me saying

"Baby, me too!"

I chuckled at this at went of to look for them, eventually finding them sprawled out on the sofas drinking beer.

"Bella" Rose squealed and bundled me in her arms.

Laughing I said "Rose, I only saw you yesterday, why so excited?"

"I just missed you"cried Rose

"Baby, i'm hurt" Emmett said in a mock-saddened tone.

Giggling, Rose prodded him in the ribs and said "Sorry honey, I only have eyes for Bella now."

Winking back at her I relieved Em's drink cabinet of a beer.

"Look at this" Emmett joked, "First you steal my woman and now you steal my beer!"

"She was my woman long before you" I replied teasingly,

"back when we were students living together we even used to share a bed"

Emmett groaned as he mentally viewed this bit of information and roughly pulled Rose onto his knee trying to subtly grope her.

It wasn't subtle enough

"Aargghh! My eyes, my eyes!" I cried as I pretended to block the view with a cushion.

Unfortunately the noise had startled Rosalie who had promptly elbowed Emmett in the balls causing him to fall to the floor screaming,

"My balls! My bloody balls!"

as me and Rose staggered around laughing hysterically, tears coming out of our eyes.

When I was back at Mr Cullen's house I missed the others.

I'd grown close to them over the few weeks I'd now been working for Mr Cullen and they were always ready to bitch with me about their "stupid brother" as Emmett called him,

or cheer me up when things seemed bad.

Evenings alone with him were the worst.

I tried to avoid him as much as I could but inevitably I always ended up in the same room as him and it would have looked petty and childish to leave every room he was in.

Instead we made brief conversation.

His tone was as curt and polite as ever but he constantly kept avoiding my gaze as if he didn't want to be there.

Some nights however, he wasn't here.

These were night when I knew he was out with other women.

He never brought them back here.

Emmett said he took them to his manor outside London so they didn't know where he lived most of the time, but he was still going for the same thing.

Easy pussy with cheap whores.

Those nights were the worst.

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	14. Do not touch what is mine!

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**Epov**

I found myself getting more and more entranced by Bella,

she was like my beautiful obsession.

Mine.

But just because I wanted her didn't mean I could have her.

I'd actually listened to my big brother for once when he said I wasn't allowed to touch her.

Usually I do the exact opposite of everything he says, and it usually works to my benefit.

When we were kids he used to exploit that fact though.

Every time he wanted me to do something for him he always told me not to and then I always did.

I knew he was conning me but it was the pure principle of it.

Anyway, just because I wanted her and couldn't have her didn't mean I couldn't have anybody.

I wasn't about to sit at home all day and gaze mournfully on the love i'd never know...

as if!

I went out about my business as usual,

and my business was pussy.

It was never hard to find when you were an actor and there was always plenty of it.

And, as usual, whenever I got it they always had to go to my manor house,

never to my apartment.

It wasn't just because it was my personal space any more either.

Bella had been working for me for several months now and we'd decided to forget past comments and had gotten closer and closer.

Bringing a woman back to the apartment would have felt lie an invasion of Bella's privacy.

I did notice however that however friendly me and Bella now were,

every time I wandered back in the morning having not been there the night before she was a lot cooler towards me and distanced herself as much as possible.

She couldn't be jealous could she?

No, Emmett had told me I wasn't her type and she'd got all offended in the first few weeks when I tried to hint I liked her.

No, she was probably embarrassed, ashamed that she barely got any.

In fact, in all the months she'd been working for me I hadn't seen her with anyone so she can't have been getting any!

I was secretly glad about this to be honest.

I still thought of her as my possession,

and I don't like to share things.

**Bpov**

Months had passed and I was still working for Mr Cullen.

We'd become a lot more friendly though I was still yet to adress him as Edward to his face.

In fact the only time he was Edward was late at night when I was laying in my bed,

the soft white sheets draped over me as I felt my hands start to caress my body,

the image of him in my mind, touching, kissing,

his hands skimming over my stomach and teasing my breasts, the need in my core getting stronger and stronger until I allowed my hands to venture between my thighs.

It was then that I found solace,

and it was then in my mind, when I cried out, that he was Edward.

We had discussed past issues and had decided to put them behind us,

focussing now on creating a solid friendship to enable a good working enviroment.

None of this stopped the pain I felt when I saw him come back home in the mornings,

whistling with his trademark crooked smirk plastered to his face.

He never seemed to notice my awkwardness then, the distance I put between us and the jealousy I felt.

In fact, he never seemed to notice my emotions at all.

And the only time I ever allowed myself to believe he could see him and me together was occasionally, when I was cleaning, bending over to pick something up or standing on the points of my toes to reach a high shelf, my breasts straining out of my shirt.

It was then I could feel him watching me,

his gaze burning into my skin,

the tiresome blush slowly rising up my cheeks.

But whenever I turned to face him he was always looking away,

so I placed those thoughts to the back of my mind, convincing myself I was imagining them.

They only came out at night when I was alone again.

Oh God! I couldn't go on like this!

I swear I blush now a million more times a day than I used to.

And it's affecting my clumsiness because my mind is on other things.

One certain other thing.

One certain gorgeous, bronze haired, green eyed, other thing.

I found myself falling over all the time and constantly being caught by the same strong, muscular arms, picking me up and putting me back on my feet with a crooked smirk.

And that just didn't help at all!

I needed to tell someone I was in lust with my boss.

I couldn't tell Alice because she was Mr Cullen's sister.

I couldn't tell Rose because she relayed everything back to Em these days and he was sure to tease me mercilessly forever!

I needed Jake.

Sweet, handsome, loving Jake.

Sweet, handsome, loving, very very gay Jake.

He would be perfect!

We could bitch AND he could tell me what he thinks from the guys point of view!

I got out my mobile, pressed his speed dial number and waited impatiently for him to pick up.

When he finally did he greeted me with a

"Bitch where've you been all my life?"

Chuckling to myself I replied

"Hey Jake, I have gossip and I need you and a very strong coffee. Come meet me?"

"Now darling I have always known you need me! Who doesn't?" he threw back at me, I could hear the smile in his voice, "But seeing as you haven't called me in so long I need more persuasion to come see you, start begging!"

I groaned at this but knew I had no choice,

"Oh sweet and gorgeous, handsome Jacob, I need your infinite wisdom to guide me through the ways of lust and beautiful men, please come and bless me with your presence at Starbucks!"

"Lust and beautiful men!Well why didn't you say so before? I'm already on my way" he said excitedly and put the phone down on me without another word!

Bitch I thought to myself as I smiled and went to get my coat.

**Epov**

I got back to my apartment late today.

The pussy last night was appalling and I couldn't wait to get rid of her but the bitch was so clingy she just would not let me go!

Anyway, when I got back I couldn't find Bella anywhere.

I stared out of my window, pondering where she might be, Alice's perhaps or at Emmett's pad,

when I saw her.

She was walking across the street, smiling and laughing,

the wind blowing her chestnut curls all around her face like a halo,

and she wasn't alone.

She was arm in arm with an tall, ripped and evidently very handsome guy and they were laughing and joking together.

I felt my temperature rise and my blood start to boil as they walked towards our building.

OUR building, mine and Bella's.

But he was with Bella,

he was touching what is mine.

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	15. Queer eye for the straight girl?

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**Bpov**

The chat with Jake had been very therapeutic to say the least.

We'd sat down at Starbucks and ordered our usual,

a gingerbread latte for me, well it was Christmas time after all,

and a caramel coffee frappucino with whipped cream and chocolate sprinkles for Jake.

He always was the exuberant one but I've gotta admit,

I was a tiny bit jealous that he could drink that and not put on an ounce of weight,

I blamed it on him being a guy.

After that we'd got down to business and started talking.

I told him all about Mr Cullen,

how every time he looked at me or gave that panty wetting smile I didn't know what to do.

How jealous I felt when he came home the next morning having been sleeping with some bitch.

How angry it made me that he didn't seem to care.

The way his dark, green eyes burnt into me,

his bronze hair, constantly tousled and always beautiful, reflected the stark winter sunlight.

And even more embarrassing,

the way he made me feel at night,

alone,

in bed.

"Doll," Jake had said to me, "I've seen this guy in his movies and I'll agree with you that he is sex on legs bu this sounds more like love than lust to me"

but I laughed off his comment and chastised him for being an idiot.

It couldn't be love could it?

No, I barely knew the guy.

He meekly agreed and slyly suggested we go shopping together so he could make it up so me.

I knew he only wanted me with him so it didn't look odd when he was picking up dresses from the rack all on his own and having to go to the men's changing rooms.

Laughing I'd agreed and true to his word he'd made it up to me by buying me a silk baby doll that I could pass of as pyjamas.

It as beautiful, a deep, dark blue with silver threading and two shear sections and the waist.

It contrasted beautifully with my creamy skin and seemed to bring out my eyes.

On the way home me and Jake were walking arm in arm,

laughing and joking,

Jake teasing me about my crush on Mr Cullen and suggesting I try and seduce him.

I laughed this off as well, I'd never seduced anyone in my life!

I'd have no idea how to go about it.

When we got back to my building we ran into James the doorman.

He greeted me cheerfully and asked how I was,

all the time subtly trying to check out Jake.

I replied with a "great thanks,"

and when Jake coughed loudly and not so subtly stood on my foot I decided to put them both out of their misery and introduce each other.

"James, this is Jake, Jake is a massive bitch as you just saw from standing on my feet and likes to buy women's underwear, Jake this is James and it's a great pity that he's gay" I chuckled.

Jake went into smooth talking mode straight away,

"Now baby Bells, how in the world did you manage to hide such a fine specimen of a man away from me for so long?"

I groaned at the cheesiness of it all and left them to swap numbers, smiling to myself, as I trudged into the lift.

**Epov**

I was absolutely fuming.

Pacing around the apartment my hand pulling at my hair.

Where the fuck were they?

I 'd seen the entering the building at least ten minutes ago!

What were they doing?

Was he fucking her up against some wall?

I cringed at this thought,

the idea of it seemed so harsh, so forceful,

not right for my Bella.

Just then the door opened and Bella came in, trembling a little from the cold.

She greeted me cordially with a friendly "Hi Mr Cullen how was your day?"

I couldn't even bear to look at her.

She'd been out with another man,

why couldn't she understand that she was mine?

I could feel her eyes on me,

those beautiful, big, soulful eyes.

"Mr Cullen", She called out softly, "is something wrong?"

I still couldn't face her.

"Mr Cullen?"

she walked up quietly behind me and snaked her tiny hand over my shoulder, in an act of concern.

That was what did it.

I whipped around pulled her roughly into me and kissed her.

Not gently or warmly.

It was rough, full of hatred and regret, sadness and anger.

I heard her moan beneath my touch,

I pushed her away,

spat "Mine!" at her,

and left the apartment, slamming the door behind me.

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	16. All about man

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**Bpov**

Oh God!

I was in heaven,

I was melting into him,

his hot mouth on mine,

biting down on my bottom lip,

deep, sexy,

his tongue invading my mouth,

hot , desperate,

and utterly, utterly heartbreaking.

He didn't want me,

he was using me,

there was nothing in his kiss that told me he needed me, he wanted me,

like I wanted him.

Then he pulled away, leaving me cold and empty,

I wanted to cling on, I didn't want to let him go.

"Mine" he spat on me,

and then he ran out!

Slammed the door and left!

Left me!

And so I sat down on the couch and cried.

**Epov**

I stopped outside my door and put my head in my hands.

Leaning back on the door I slid down and tried to forget everything i'd just done.

How could I do that to Bella?

My Bella!

She doesn't even know she's my Bella...

What was I supposed to do?

I could go back in and talk to her, but then she might reject me.

I could leave and send her away but then I might lose her forever.

I needed to get out of here.

I needed to go and see Alice.

Figuring I needed a bit of time to cool down before seeing Alice I tried to take my time, choosing to run down the stairs instead of getting the lift.

When I reached the foyer however, I ran into the one thing that could make this situation worse.

That guy, the guy Bella had been with was still there, laughing and joking with James.

Traitor!

I saw red and went to hit the guy whilst shouting

"You fucking bastard! What the fuck do you think your doing with my Bella? She's fucking mine! I don't want you anywhere fucking near her again!"

The guy stood there looking bemused, blocked my hit and smacked me in the face.

Fuck that guy could pack a punch!

I felt the back of my head hit the walk and slid down the wall for the second time.

"Shit, sorry man!" the guy said "you kinda took me by surprise!"

"Mr Cullen, sir, what the hell were you thinking?" James said,

he knelt down next to me and sat me back up straight.

"Now, Edward, listen to me" James said, "Jake here is Bella's best friend, he's not about to stop seeing her just because you said so."

"But she's mine" I mumbled.

"She's not Edward, you just want her to be", James said gently, "maybe you should think about that for a moment. She could be yours but you've gotta earn her man you can't just claim her."

"Yeah", this Jake guy agreed, "Now I know my lil doll is all about your cute ass but I swear man you hurt her and I'll break you!"

"I thought you were with her" I said, feeling worse and worse, all they were saying was true.

"Now hey man", Jake said to me, " I'll be the first to admit that my Bells is the best doll anyone's going to get but I'm more about my man James here if you get what I'm talking about" and he winked at me!

Oh God he was gay!

And i'd thought Bella was with him!

And I hadn't even bothered to try and talk to her, I'd just kissed her and left!

Shit!

What was I supposed to do now?

Forgetting all about going to see Alice I raced back upstairs.

Gasping for breath and red in the face I slammed open the door.

She wasn't there.

But she had to be!

I started tearing through the apartment searching for her.

Eventually I found her in her room packing up a small suitcase, tear tracks streaked down her face.

My heart started to break.

"Bella.." I started but she turned away from me.

"Bella, please, I'm so sorry."

she turned to face me and raised her eyebrows, inviting me to go on.

"Bella, listen, I'm an idiot, I jumped to conclusions, I can't deny I've got feeling for you but I know I can't act on them because your my employee, and I thought you were with that Jake guy so I went down and tried to hit him but then he hit me and then him and James talked to me and made me figure out what an ass I am and I'm sorry!" I blurted out as fast as I could, looking shamefaced.

"You...you have feelings for me?" Bella whispered

"And you hit Jake?" her tone getting louder.

"well, yes and then no. I do have feelings for you but I didn't hit Jake, he actually hit me."

"Riiight" said Bella, "I think I'm gonna go stay with Rose or Alice for a few days, clear my head and everything. I think you need to clear your head too."

She closed her suitcase and raised her eyes to meet mine, tears still filling them, clinging to her eyelashes.

Beautiful.

She walked up to me, stood up on her tiptoes and kissed me on the cheek.

And then she left saying "Goodbye Edward."

She said my name,

and I'd just lost her.

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	17. Frenemies

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**Bpov**

As I left I thought about all that had happened and all that was yet to be done.

I'd become Edward's maid and I think maybe that's when I started wanting him.

We'd fought a lot and that's when the disappointment that he didn't want me back came in.

He'd got jealous and kissed me and that's when I realised he wanted me too.

But now I had to leave,

I had to work out what was happening from here,

he was right,

I'm his employee, I can't be with him.

But can I be without him?

As I reached the bottom of the stairs I saw Jake,

still standing there, deep in conversation with James.

Not wanting to interrupt what looked like it could be beautiful,

I slipped through the back door, silently and unnoticed.

I was glad one of us could be given their happiness.

It was early December and as I walked through the streets of London it began to snow.

Icy white flakes fell down, covering me, clinging to my eyelashes.

Time passed slowly but when I eventually reached Rose's place I was freezing.

As soon as i'd rung the bell, the door was flung open by Emmett, who, upon seeing how cold I was, cursed and pulled me inside.

Rose ran to me crying "Bella, Bella love what happened?"

I just stood there, feeling numb and as I laid eyes on their concerned expressions, I finally began to cry.

Sobs racked my body as Rose pulled me into her arms,

soothing me and rocking me gently.

"Em," she said, " I need you to get Alice round and then go stay with Jasper for tonight will you?"

He nodded dumbly, shocked at the emotional outburst and did as he was told.

Sure enough, half an hour later, me, Alice and Rose were all sat, cuddled up on the sofa in front of the telly, warming ourselves with copious amounts of hot chocolate.

I told them everything that had just happened between me and Edward,

from the kiss to the fight with Jake and ending in me leaving.

They both just sat them for a little while, letting everything sink in.

Then Alice piped up, her musical high voice uncommonly serious,

"Bella, I've never seen Edward act like this before, he usually doesn't bother with pussy he knows he can't get and goes on to chase something else. If he's so jealous and possessive towards you that he'll fight for you that must mean something."

I flinched at the word pussy and Rose looked sharply at Alice and replied,

"But what if Edward sees Bella as a goal? A trophy of sorts, the ultimate prize to be won and then forgotten?"

"He doesn't," replied Alice lowly, "that much I can promise you."

"Then what am I supposed to do?" I asked.

Eventually it was decided that the best thing to do would be to wipe the slate clean.

I would still be his employee but we would be equal friends and hopefully that diffuse the situation.

I couldn't face getting my hopes up again just to be knocked back.

Friendship it would have to be.

**Epov**

I fell back on to the sofa, my head in my hands and thought about what i'd just done.

I'd kissed her.

My Bella.

I had possessed her,

and now she was gone.

Looking out of the window I saw the first flakes of snow falling.

It was like the weather was reflecting my grief,

crying for me but in such a beautiful way, so as to emphasize the beauty of my Bella.

Idly I wondered who she'd go to.

Rose's I expected.

Picking up my phone I rang Emmett, I was checking up on her I told myself,

I just wanted to make sure she got there okay.

He answered after the first few rings,

"Hey man is Bella with you?" I asked.

"No she's with Rose back at our place and Alice is there too, I'm at Jazz's with him. Man you have fucked up big time! Bella looked like she was going to start sobbing when I left."

"I know," I groaned, " I can't believe what I did, can you guys come round and go through it with me? I need some family right now."

"Fine," Emmett said, "But don't think i'm about to forgive you just because your upset! You hurt Bells and you'll have to pay for that."

"I already am" I muttered, but he'd gone.

A while later all three of us were at my place sprawled across the floor.

I'd told them all i'd done and let's just say they weren't impressed.

We finally came up with the solution that I should try and play it cool and just return to friendship but make sure she's my equal and was comfortable around me,

As the boys got up to go I pulled Em into a brotherly hug and thanked him.

Then he turned away, shamefaced.

"Jasper, it's time," he whispered, "Edward we've got a confession to make."

I was confused, they'd just hepled me so much and now they were about to drop another bomb on me.

Jasper started in his thick southern drawl, "Edward, when we were looking for a housekeeper for you we trawled through endless amounts of fake, slutty, plastic to find Bella because it wasn't just a housekeeper we were looking for. We wanted to find someone both beautiful and clever, courageous and honest, but most of all we wanted to find someone who could calm you. Who you'd settle down with and make each other happy. Edward, we set you two up, this is all our fault."

"I'm sorry little bro" grunted Emmett.

With that they both gave me one last regretful look and ran from the door.

I stood there, ashen faced and full of shock and with that downed my beer in one and went to bed, vowing to kill my bastard brother and best friend.

A while later my phone beeped, waking me up.

An unknown number flashed up on screen and a message saying:

_Friends? Bella xx_

I smiled to my self and thanked God for forgiveness, replying instantly with a solid:

_Friends. x_

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	18. Finger sucking's just for babies?

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**Bpov**

After the kissing incident I didn't know how things were gonna work out,

but actually they took a turn for the better.

Although me and Edward both agreed we couldn't be together,

we made a conscious effort to be friends and it seemed to be working.

Edward was of course, still my employer but he wasn't ordering me around as much.

And he'd stopped being such a dick to me, that was a massive bonus.

He said he'd try and curb his jealousy as well and although I nodded in agreement inside I was crying out in protest!

Is it wrong of me to find the whole jealousy, possession thing really, REALLY hot?

Nowadays we hung out with the group on evenings and I was always there to greet Edward after a day filming and he was always there to tease me about Jake who, I'd stupidly revealed one drunken night, I really used to fancy until he turned out to be gay.

It was mid December now and the whole friend thing was really working out.

The group were supposed to be coming over tonight for a movie session so I agreed to get in some snacks.

I was stood at the sink washing strawberries to dip in melted chocolate when I heard Edward come home.

Smiling to myself, I turned around and smiled at him.

He kissed me on the cheek in greeting, stole a strawberry and then dipped his fingers in the chocolate the bastard!

I aimed a smack at him as he ran off laughing to get showered and changed.

When I'd finished up in the kitchen and was just making the lounge comfy, Edward came back in wearing just a pair of sweat pants.

Looking at him I groaned and said " Em and Jazz will kill you if they see you like that".

Edward chuckled and replied "No they won't, I already called the guys and told them we were having a pyjama party. Em was nearly beside himself! I think he has a warped idea of what girls do a slumber parties. That and I told him you were into naked wrestling!" and the bastard winked at me!

"Edward!" I screamed at him but I couldn't help giggle a bit.

Whilst we were arguing over what film to watch and where to sit (I wanted to watch something Edward was in, surprise, surprise he didn't) the guys came in.

"My god you guys get a room!" Alice squealed, "You fight like an old married couple!"

Me and Edward both looked at her, looked back at each other and continued on.

Alice let out an exasperated sigh and through her hands up in the air, rolling her eyes at Jasper.

Suddenly we all noticed Emmett's morose face and went silent.

"Emmy what's up?" I asked.

"Just ignore him" answered Rose laughing, "He's been like this all day, ever since he opened number seventeen on his advent calendar this morning to find out there wasn't a chocolate behind it!"

Everybody burst out laughing and Emmett shouted "They fucking lied to me! It said a chocolate behind every window!"

Settling down in front of the massive telly, we eventually decided to watch the Hangover, thus pleasing everyone.

Things were great, sweet strawberries were being passed round covered in melted chocolate,

Emmett was sat on a beanbag with Rose resting between his knees, Jasper and Alice were cuddled up on part of the sofa and Edward...was sitting in my seat!

The sneaky git he knows that's where I always sit!

"Out of my seat!" I cried at him.

He smirked and shook his head, refusing to move.

"But it's where I always sit!" I cried again indignantly.

"There go the married couple again" Jazz murmured as I shot him a filthy look.

Finally Edward sighed and got up.

The smug look on my face proved how happy I was about this until he walked up to me,

picked me up as if I were as light as a feather, and threw me over his shoulder.

He walked with me, kicking and screaming, back to the sofa and sat down, pulling me onto his lap and holding me tight between his arms.

I continued struggling but then decide to settle,

it was warm and comfortable,

he was shirtless and he smelled so good.

Who was I to complain?

**Epov**

I always thought my apartment was just for me but now with a group of friends gathered around me I realised I was happier when I wasn't alone.

I looked down at the beautiful girl in my arms and started playing with one of the tendrils in her chestnut hair.

I was so glad she'd forgiven me and we'd worked out this whole friendship thing.

Apart from, what friend gets hard when another friend is sat on their knee?

Or what friend's heart starts beating louder and faster when they see their friend so you're sure they can hear it?

Yeah, I was gonna have to work on those things.

Looking down again, I watched Bella finish of the strawberry she had been eating, her fingers covered in chocolate.

As if it were a reflex action I reached down and grabbed her fingers,

pulling them up to my mouth, I slowly sucked the sweet chocolate of every one, one at a time.

She didn't stop me, she just looked up into my eyes,

her soulful, dark orbs full of a need I thought I recognised..,

pleading?

The whole room had gone silent,

everyone had taken their eyes of the TV screen to watch us.

Having realized, Bella turned her beautiful blushing face from them and hit it in my crotch.

Cue me trying very hard not to move so she didn't realise 'my little 'big' problem.

"Shit!" Emmett gasped, "that was better than any porn I've ever seen!"

Rose smacked him and to try and diffuse the situation I started another conversation,

"So, you're all coming to my country house for Christmas right?"

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	19. Driving home for Christmas

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**Epov**

I loved Christmas.

I smiled to myself as I remembered past Christmas'

When we were little my family used to go all out, mainly for Alice's benefit as she was so into the glitz and sparkle as she used to say.

Me, Em and my dad, Carlisle, would all go out at the beginning of December and cut down a tree to drag home.

My mum, Esme, would shout and scream at us as we dragged it through the house, knocking pictures and ornaments off and dropping pine needles everywhere but she didn't mind really.

We'd all work together to put decorations up until the house resembled Santa's grotto and mum was bouncing around the place having drunk waaaay too much mulled wine, trying to persuade dad to dress up as Santa so she could sit on his knee.

I shook my head, trying to rid myself of that thought,

that was one memory I could do without I decided.

This year I'd been working right up until the 20th of December and I hated the fact that nothing was done for Christmas yet.

The group and I including Bella had all agreed to go and spend Christmas down at my country home with mum and dad.

I felt kind of worried at first that Bella would feel obliged to come,

I didn't want to keep her away from her family,

but she informed me that her mum and her new husband Phil would be having a booze up with all their friends and her dad, Charlie, spent his Christmas' watching the game with Jacob's dad, Billy, and so would be better off without her in the way.

I didn't know whether to smile or cry at this revelation of Bella's parents,

but she spoke about them with such love and tenderness that I felt obliged to feel that this was a situation they were all comfortable with.

Either way, I was happy I'd have Bella with me at Christmas,

I just didn't know whether the twelve bunches of mistletoe I'd bought to scatter around the house would be considered too suggestive...

Luckily I finished early on the 20th and so Bella and the guys agreed to meet me at the film set where I was just finishing up.

Piling into two separate cars we set off,

all chattering and laughing loudly,

Bella falling over a pile of suitcases we'd tried to balance on the back seat,

me pulling over halfway there and insisting I would make Em walk the rest of the way unless he gave up trying to sing along to the Christmas tunes I had on.

"Hey I could have been a class act singer!" Em proclaimed in an awful attempt at an Irish accent as he sang along with the Pogues.

"Right that's it!" I shouted "Em out of the bloody car before I have to kill you! Jazz and Alice can have you in their car instead!"

Bella and Rose were falling about laughing at Emmett's forlorn expression.

"Rosie, baby, make him be nice!" He beseeched,

"Sorry Emmy" Rose giggled, "He's right either you go or the music goes and I think we're keeping the music" she winked at him, "but don't worry sexy, tonight we'll make lots of music and I promise I won't stop you once!"

"Aaarrrggghhh! My ears! Please stop!" Bella yelled,

"Not in my house!" I bellowed and shut the door on Emmett,

leaving him standing there laughing for Jasper and Alice to pick up.

**Bpov**

As we drove up to the house my mouth fell open in shock.

This wasn't a house it was a bloody mansion!

Edward had clearly forgotten to relay that bit of information to me when he was describing it in the car.

My phone rang and the sound of Material Girl filled the air.

Alice

"Bella!" she cried testily, "are you there yet?"

"Yeah, we've just pulled up" I replied.

"Right, well no one is allowed to start decorating until I'm there okay!" she cried

"Okay, what time do you think you'll be around?" I said, confused, I was sure her car had been right behind us the whole way, why was she worried she'd be late?

"Not for at least half an hour!" she screamed through the phone, "That big beast of a brother you left by the wayside for us to pick up insisted he was starving to death so I said we'd stop off at the service station for five minutes, next thing I know he's found an 'All you can eat' buffet and taken the sign as a personal challenge! At this rate we'll have to roll him through the door!"

I burst out laughing, " Alright Alice, keep calm, I promise we'll wait for you, see you later."

I relayed the phone call to the others and Edward, like me, burst out laughing while Rose groaned and put her head in the hands.

Edward led us all into the house and showed us round,

eventually depositing me in a beautiful room overlooking the lake outside.

I mean a lake, really, who has a lake at their home and refers to it as a house?

I sat myself down on the four poster bed and luxuriated in the silk sheets, thanking God I was going to be here for an entire week.

After unpacking all my stuff I went back down to the lounge where Alice and Jasper were warming up in front of the fire place, having just arrived in a flurry of snowflakes.

Em was laying on the floor groaning and clutching his stomach whilst Rose sat on the sofa next to him, every now and again prodding his stomach with her foot to tease him some more.

Edward came in from the kitchen carrying a tray of hot chocolate and looking like a God.

At the mere mention of hot chocolate Emmett sat up having miraculously recovered and downed his in one.

We all sat around as it got dark, laughing and joking,

teasing Emmett about his inability to act like an adult and referring to Rose as his babysitter.

We'd decided that we weren't going to decorate until tomorrow when Edward's parents got here,

so as it was late I decided to head of to bed.

After bidding everyone goodnight with a kiss on the cheek and a lingering hug in Edward's case I left, wandering back to my bedroom, touching the place on my cheek where Edward had just kissed me, feeling electricity run through it.

Just as I was about to close the bedroom door behind me I heard Emmett's voice floating down the corridor,

"Bet you didn't ever think your Austin Power's style shag pad would be used for family Christmas' huh Edward?"

Edward groaned and I subsequently froze.

This was where Edward brought back all his conquests,

those long, sleepless nights where I'd been alone, he had been here, messing around with some pussy.

Suddenly the silken sheeted bed didn't look so appealing anymore...

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	20. Let it snow!

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**Bpov**

I'd made it through the night without thinking too much about Edward and his women.

After all, he'd brought me here with the group,

treated me like family,

at least that was something.

I woke up early the next morning to find light flooding my room.

Crossing over to the window, I looked out and saw the earth clothed with snow,

snowflakes still falling lightly around, making everything infinitely more beautiful.

Although it was early I heard shouts and cries of laughter from the garden below me.

Looking down I saw the boys out having a snowball fight.

Emmett was dancing around, howling with laughter as Jasper started spitting out the snow that had just hit him, full force, in the face.

My eyes sought out Edward and my heart swelled with love as I watched the snowflakes dance around him and fall in his hair, coating him in a light haze of white...

Wait a minute, did I just think love?

Tearing my eyes away from them, I put myself together,

jumping in and out of the shower,

letting my hair dry naturally in chestnut curls bouncing around my shoulders and slicking on a little mascara and lip gloss,

before throwing on my thermal black leggings, a grey sweatshirt and a chunky knitted scarf and making my way downstairs.

Alice and Rose were sat at the wooden table watching the boys out of the glass doors and smiling ruefully as the men continued to play.

"Looks like they're having fun" I commented to them both.

"They're behaving like children" Rose tutted, smiling to herself.

"Want to go out and join them?" I asked

"Definitely" they both smiled and out we went into the freezing cold.

Emmett and Jasper both instantly grabbed their respective women and pulled them in for a kiss in the snow, their protective sides coming out as they tried to keep the girls.

I watched on with a sad smile, my arms wrapped around myself.

Then I felt a hand rest on my back and turned my head slightly to see Edward.

He wasn't looking at me, he was looking on at the scene of love displayed before us and silently comforting me and perhaps himself and the same time.

An act of consolidation, no one wants to feel alone at Christmas.

Naturally Emmett had to break the silence by yelling

"Snowball fight! Everybody for themselves! Run!Run!RUN!"

Edward burst out into hearty laughter as Alice and Rose screamed and I ran to hide behind a tree.

The fight ensued for about an hour, everyone was covered in snow and crying with laughter as we watched Emmett run around like a child on Christmas day, so excited, building himself a fort and a pile of snowballs to get people with.

Jasper was chasing Alice around, trying to bury her in the snow and I had just saved Rose from being hit by Emmett after throwing a snowball at him from behind and leaving him looking around, confused as to where it had come from, even looking up at the sky as it it had just fallen from there.

Feeling quite proud of myself for causing yet more bewilderment for Emmett and saving Rose in one go, I went to hide back behind my tree, looking for my next target.

Peeking out from behind the trunk I counted the people in the snow.

Alice was stood over Jasper, a look of triumph on her face as she pelted him with snow.

Emmett was stood laughing and pointing at Jasper for being such a pussy, and Rose was trying to steal Emmett's supply of snowballs.

So where was Edward?

Just then I felt someone's warm, sweet smelling breath on the back of my neck, I knew exactly who it was and my senses began to tingle.

I started to run for cover, Edward pursuing me, laughing and throwing snow.

Hearing him come up behind me again, I turned around, slipped on a piece of ice and promptly fell over, grabbing his arm as I went down and pulling me down on top of me.

We lay still and silent for a moment,

him still on top of me,

his sweet smelling breath boring into me and his beautiful green eyes darkening as they met mine.

He brought his hand up to my face and caressed my cheek, I leant into him, breathing in his beautiful scent, his face lowered slowly towards mine, my eyes on his jaw, the perfect, sculpted outline and cheekbones, framing the full, soft lips, a hint of stubble covering his strong chin.

He was coming closer and closer, I laid back and shut my eyes, feeling his nose against mine, sure his lips were going to lower on to mine at any second when...

"Guys come on we're going in it's bloody freezing! Shit! Eddie! You getting your thing on in the snow?" Emmett smirked at us.

Edward groaned and buried his face in my hair as Emmett sauntered off.

Sighing, he got back up and offered me his hand, pulling me up as if I weighed nothing.

Still staying silent, he kept hold of my hand and led me back inside.

The house was full of noise and laughter again.

Warm and toasty as we all got changed out of our wet things, I realised I didn't have another sweatshirt with me so Edward lent me one of his.

The guys then went out again to go and cut down a tree, a Cullen family tradition apparently, to decorate before their parents got here so I waved them off and then wandered into the kitchen to fix us all something hot to eat.

**Epov**

This morning had been fucking awesome, well up to the point when my dickwad of a brother burst in on me as I had been about to kiss Bella.

Thinking back though, maybe I should be thanking him.

I did say I wouldn't touch her and I'd never have been able to stop on my own.

Back inside, we were all getting changed out of our wet clothes when I heard a knock on my bedroom door.

I answered it, wearing only my towel, slung low on my waist.

It was Bella.

"Do you have a spare sweatshirt I can borrow? It's just that the one I brought is covered in snow and I didn't think to bring anymore cause I didn't know that is would get wet and now I don't have one and it's cold" she rambled out, all in one go, that blush I love so much rising up her cheeks as she stared determinately at the floor, trying to avoid looking at my somewhat casual attire.

An amused smile graced my face and I chuckled.

"Yeah I'm sure I left one here in the room you're in, just give me a minute" I replied and went of to get it.

A few seconds later I was back, handing over the soft grey hoodie I always kept in their.

My high school team sweatshirt with my name on the back. She took it gratefully and slipped it over her head.

Seeing my name on her back again sent strange feeling through me, making my cock begin to get hard, not an easy thing to hide in a towel.

"You gave me your room?" she questioned softly

"I wanted you to be as comfortable as possible" I answered honestly.

With that she smiled and left as I threw on some clothes and prepared to go out and cut down the Cullen Christmas tree with Emmett and Jazz.

Returning home later having dragged that bloody tree for what seemed like miles, the most delicious smell hit me, wafting around the house.

Wandering into the kitchen I found Bella had been baking.

Covering the surfaces were assorted cookies and muffins all smelling amazing, with an equally amazing girl stood in the middle of them all.

"Shit, I think I love you!" I laughed at Bella as I took a chocolate chip cookie in one hand and an oatmeal and syrup one in the other.

"You think?" shouted Emmett running in behind me and stuffing two muffins in his mouth at once and moaning.

"Shit, Bells, will you marry me?" he moaned through a mouthful of cake and earning him a sharp smack from Rose and a laugh from Bella.

After eating what I'm pretty sure was my body weight in cookies and cakes, we set about decorating the place.

Alice had roped Jasper into starting a couple of hours ago and the house was pretty festive looking already.

Wreaths adorned every door, garlands of holly, ivy and berries were wrapped around all the banisters and the fire places.

Cards were stuck up around the rooms, candles adorned just about every service and each room had at least two poinsettia's in them. Scented oil burners were burning in the windows, wafting out the smell of oranges and cloves and the windows themselves were covered in fake snow.

Most importantly, I thought, the bunches of mistletoe I'd bought had been put up at strategic places throughout the house.

The only thing left to do really was the tree.

Heaving it up into a stand in the lounge, we all busied ourselves covering it with tinsel and flashing lights and various decorations, some of which I remember making as a kid.

Finally, I took hold of Bella, and, giving her the fairy, lifted her up to place it on the top of the tree.

We all took a step back and looked at our creation.

I heard a noise behind us and turned to see my mum and dad stood in the doorway.

"Oh children it's beautiful!" my mum cried as my dad beamed at us all.

Squealing, Alice ran to hug mum as dad came to us and gave everyone including Bella a hug.

After settling everyone down and chatting about how their journey had been, mum decided it was time to get more into the festive spirit.

Lighting the fire, she pinned a few stockings to the fireplace and turned around to beam at us, chiming, "Right, who's for a drink?"

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	21. Truth or Dare?

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**Bpov**

It was Christmas Eve, we'd been at Edward's country house for a couple of days now and it had been brilliant so far.

Edward's mum, Esme, was amazing!

The first time I met them, the first thing I saw was where Edward, Alice and Emmett got their good looks from.

Their father, Dr Carlisle Cullen was absolutely beautiful!

A perfect face with sculpted cheekbones and a strong, chiselled jaw,

Deep, grey, stormy eyes, outlined with laughter lines that softened his face,

and perfect blonde hair.

God, if he wasn't married, I thought.

Esme was also classically beautiful.

Long, thick, wavy, auburn hair framed a perfect elfin face, one of the features Alice had inherited off her, and set in the centre of that perfect face with its rosebud lips were Edward's eyes, a deep forest green, beautiful to behold.

They were both almost too stunning to be true,

I'm sure given the chance, I'd do them both!

Esme was a party animal, since the moment she'd arrived the celebrations hadn't stopped!

Drink and laughter flowed as easy as the conversation and at that point I forgot that we didn't always belong together.

At that point, Edward wasn't the international movie star and I wasn't his maid, we were all just friends.

It seemed Alice had inherited her enthusiasm for Christmas from Esme as well because as it drew closer to the evening she got more and more excited, insisting we play games to make the time go faster.

We searched the house for as much booze as we could find, lit a few candles, and then sat down to play a massive family game of trivial pursuit, with the losers taking a shot each time.

Esme was getting more and more boisterous as the alcohol flowed, finally jumping up and throwing on some music.

"Come on let's dance!" she cried, swirling her hips around and almost tottering over on the immensely high heels she insisted on wearing.

Laughing, we figured, if you can't beat her, join her! After all, we were all suitably pissed and it was Christmas!

Rose grabbed my hand and pulled me too her, wrapping her body around mine and swaying our hips together.

It was a trick we used to do together at the clubs to pull in men.

"Shit I think this is my wet dream come true!" Emmett whispered in a strangled voice.

Rose laughed happily and let go of me to join him.

It felt good to be so relaxed and free, I knew I could dance and I knew I could be sexy.

I felt Edward's eyes burning in to me as I swayed my hips seductively and looked up at him from under my dark eyelashes, silently inviting him to come closer.

I was on my own now, everyone else had a partner to dance with apart from me and Edward, it was only natural that we danced together right?

I watched him as he moved towards me, tall and confident, commanding the room.

He looked down at me, his eyes as dark as pitch and then dropped that famous panty wetting smile, holding out his hand to me, not asking me but telling me to take it.

Pulling me into his I felt my body mould to his perfectly, each curve enveloped by the epitome of manhood.

His strong arms holding me up as we swayed together, his grinding in to me,

me letting my head rest on his shoulder as he lent down softly, not to kiss my neck as I had thought, but to bite it gently, this act of dominance made me instantly wet and I stood there, quivering, as he ran his hot tongue gently over the place he had marked me soothing the skin.

**Epov**

This evening had got better and better,

thank God for my mother and her crazy ideas!

At this very moment I was dancing with my Bella, grinding against her.

She rested her head against my shoulder and I looked down at her.

The soft candlelight had bathed her in an ethereal glow, making her even more beautiful than she already was, if that were possible.

Her eyes were closed and her thick, dusky lashes brushed against her cheek.

Her soft chestnut curls fell to one side, revealing her neck to me, the blemish less, soft, white skin, calling out for me, desperate for me to make my mark on it.

Leaning my head, I gently bit in to her, hearing a soft whimper escaping from her mouth.

I felt myself harden then and there.

Shit she tasted amazing!

Her skin was all like honey and cream, hot to the touch and she was moaning for me!

Just then the was a commotion as my mother fell over, ruining the moment and causing chaos with all her hysterical luaghter.

"Right, time for bed for us I think" my father chuckled as he lifted her with ease and began to carry her away from us, back to their room.

"Stop!" my mother commanded, in charge even in her drunk state,

she stumbled up to me and caressed my cheek with her hand as if I was a child she was comforting.

"She's yours Edward" she whispered, so only I could hear her, "She's for you, so treat her well." And with that she took my father's arm and tottered happily of to bed.

There was silence for a few seconds until Alice broke the tension with a cry of

"Truth or Dare!Bring the shots" and stumbled away laughing.

We all joined in her laughter and followed her out to the veranda, where we all sat huddled around a patio heater for warmth, watching the snow fall around the canopy we were under.

I don't think I ever appreciated how beautiful Bella was until that moment.

Her eyes shone with happiness and were filled with laughter as she ran through the snow, the flakes clinging to her lashes, making them longer than before, and covering her entire body with a kind of natural shimmer.

Even with all her beauty, it couldn't stop her feeling the cold and she was shivering so I pulled her in close to me and through a blanket around her.

"Right" said Alice, "Rosalie, Truth or Dare?"

"Dare" said Rosalie with a devilish look in her eye.

"Okay" smirked Alice, "Strip to your underwear and perform a dance of your choice to any member of this group"

Rosalie grimaced at the idea of being so unclothed in this weather but agreed to it and was soon straddling Emmett, grinding against him, much to his delight.

"Alice, Truth or Dare?" Emmett said.

"Dare" grinned Alice.

"Alright, Jasper, lay down and Alice has to take three shots off your body without using her hands"

Alice tried, and failed at this, leaving Jasper soaked and having to take a shot herself.

"Bella, your turn" Jasper smiled at her.

"Truth" Bella whispered.

"Who in this group would you most like to fuck?" asked Jasper.

"Pass" Bella squeaked, and blushing, took a shot.

I looked at her quizzically but was soon distracted by Rosalie calling my name.

"Edward, are you there? I said Truth or Dare?"

"Dare" I answered hurriedly.

"Sure" Rosalie smirked, " you have to get kiss Bella"

I turned and looked at Bella, I wasn't about to give up on a dare.

She looked back at me, the gentle blush making her face impossibly angelic.

"Come on guys" Jasper said, "Let's give these two some space"

I smiled at him gratefully as he led the others back inside, even with much protesting from Alice and Rosalie, presumably to finish their game.

I looked back at Bella and pulled her to me.

Cupping her face in my hands, I lifted it to meet mine and pulled her into a sweet, chaste kiss.

To my delight she responded, running her hands through my hair and kissing me back, harder and with more passion.

I lifted her up onto my lap and she wrapped her legs around my waist, still kissing me.

I stood up and more or less ran back to the house with her, kissing her with all the force that had been pent up inside me for so long.

Laying her out on the bed I started to pull of her top, she in turn lifted mine over my head until we were left with nothing but underwear on.

Unhooking her bra with one hand, I started kissing down her neck, slowly nipping and sucking, a soft trail down to her breasts.

I took them in my hands and kissed each, sucking on them and teasing the sensitive nipple with my fingers as she begged me for more, her breathing hot and heavy upon my now naked body.

I continued to kiss a trail down her, running my lips over the soft skin of her stomach until I reached her lacey knickers.

I looked up into her eyes for one final act of conformation and she nodded at me, her face red, her hair messy and thoroughly breathless.

I slowly pulled down the lace with my teeth, finally getting rid of them and then nestling between her legs, where I had wanted to be for so long.

I breathed in her heavenly scent, vanilla and strawberry, and lent forward to taste her.

She was exquisite, I felt her writhe and moan beneath my touch, pulling on my hair, begging me for more as I licked her hot core, unable to get enough of the beauty that was my Bella.

When neither she nor I could take it anymore, I pulled back and drove into her, feeling her hot pussy around my cock, so tight and wet, hearing her cry out my name as she begged to be allowed to come.

I thrust into her harder and faster, as I felt it rise and started to tease her clit with my fingers as I breathed out her name.

I felt her come hard around my cock with a scream of "EDWARD!" and that pulled me apart, I came in her so hard, feeling myself fill her, letting her take it all before I fell back onto her bed and pulled her into my arms, holding her close to me as we drifted of into a deep, peaceful sleep.

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	22. Bella,I'm Sorry

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**Epov**

Opening my eyes on Christmas morning, I felt the warmth of the beautiful woman laying next to me.

Her gentle breathing calmed me and I pulled her sleeping form into me closer, feeling her snuggle up against me.

I'd waited so long for this moment, watched her every day for months, growing closer and closer until all the love I felt for her came out in one night.

I hoped she realised what this action meant, I hoped she felt the love I felt too.

Closing my eyes, I prepared myself to go back to sleep for a while longer, no one was up yet, not even Alice; which was a miracle considering it was Christmas day.

Just then a loud ringing intruded my thoughts.

Groaning I realised it was my phone, and as it wasn't stopping, I gently extracted my arm out from around my Bella and went to answer it.

"Edward?"

It was my manager, Jane.

"Edward, are you there?" she demanded.

"I'm here" I muttered, damning her internally for ruining my sleep.

"Edward you have to come into work right now"

"What?" I cried, pulling a white shirt on and wandering out onto the balcony, closing the door behind me so as not to wake Bella.

"It's Christmas day! There's no way I'm coming in!"

"Edward you have to, it's the most important gig you're going to get. I know it's short notice but this meeting is going to launch you stateside, this is going to make you!" Jane exclaimed, excitedly.

I paused then, I _desperately _needed to make it stateside, my career was great here in the UK but I needed to get over to America to really broaden it, this was my big chance.

"Jane, are you sure this is it? This is the one that's going to make it? Cus it could not have come at a worse time!" I moaned.

"I'm sorry Edward, I really am, but you _need_ it. I sent a car to your house about an hour ago, it should be there any minute" she said.

Looking up I saw a black car coming down the winding driveway as she spoke.

"You're right," I said, " I can see it now."

I strode back through the French windows and paused for a second, looking at the image of serenity in front of me, the sleeping beauty, _my _sleeping beauty.

I had to explain to her that I wasn't going to be there for our Christmas but I couldn't bear to wake her up, she looked so peaceful.

Grabbing a pen and some paper I started to scribble down a letter, feeling the gut wrenching pain of regret for what I was going to miss.

"Edward, hurry up!" Jane was screaming at me, " You're already late! Just run out in the clothes you're wearing, we'll find you something to change into when you get here!"

I was panicking, looking down at the page all I'd written was _Bella, I'm sorry..._ but Jane was still shouting so I left it, hoping and praying that Bella would understand what I meant.

Taking one last look at my beautiful Bella, I sighed and closed the door behind me, running down the stairs and out of the house to the car that was waiting to take me away.

**Bpov**

Waking up in the warm, soft bed I smiled to myself as I recalled last night's events.

It had been amazing, I'd never felt so connected to a person in my life.

Sliding my hand across the pillow, I went to touch Edward, feel his warm skin against mine once more, but I couldn't feel him.

The smile fading off my face, I opened my eyes to an empty room.

A feeling of panic sparked inside of me, where had he gone? Had he left me alone?

No, I thought to myself, trying to calm down, he's probably just gone downstairs to get something to eat.

Getting up, I wrapped one of Edward's shirts around me, pulling it up to my nose and breathing in his scent.

Slipping off the bed, I walked across to the door, my hand on the handle, ready to pull it open, when something caught my attention.

On the side of the table there was a piece of paper, fluttering a little in the gentle breeze, coming in through a gap in the French windows that I hadn't opened.

Leaning over to pick it up a sense of dread filled me, I recognised the handwriting on it; it was Edward.

Looking down I read '_Bella, I'm sorry...'_,

that was it.

No explanation, no nothing, just 'I'm sorry'.

I felt my world suddenly dissolve before me, warm tears filled my eyes and trickled down my cheeks, cooling instantly in the air as I sank to the floor.

He'd left me

Used me and abandoned me.

Emmett's words from the other night came floating back to me,

_"Bet you didn't ever think your Austin Power's style shag pad would be used for family Christmas' huh Edward?"_

That's exactly what it was, his shag pad.

He'd even used his own room and everything, set it all up like this clearly.

I was a conquest, he'd just waited for months and now he's had his fun, he's left me.

And I loved him.

I still love him.

I had to get out of here, I couldn't stay in this place any longer.

Crumpling up the piece of paper, I grabbed my phone and dialled as I started to pack my things.

Finally, it answered and closing my suitcase on all my clothes, I spoke into it,

"Dad? I'm coming home."

Looking down at the shirt I'd just taken of, Edward's shirt, I knew I couldn't leave it.

Breathing in his scent one last time, I tucked it inside my handbag and shut the door.

Slipping out of the house, I walked over the snow covered fields to the next town, the mist hanging low in the air, swirling round my ankles as I made my way back home.

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	23. Silence is a virtue

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**Hope you like this next instalment.**

**AlicePOV**

It's Christmas!

Oh my God I'm so excited!

Looking to the left of me I saw Jasper still asleep in bed,

God he was such a beautiful man, he always said how lucky he was but I'm sure it's me who's the lucky one.

Stroking back a stray, golden curl from his fringe I considered giving him a Christmas treat, in order to wake him up, something to keep him in a good mood for the rest of the day.

Sliding slowly down the bed, I surveyed him with pride.

It was true, I thought to myself, no one had it better than me.

A quick glance up at his angelic face reassured me he was still fast asleep,

well, that and the gentle snores he was omitting!

Taking his manhood into my hands, I breathed a sigh of pleasure.

Running my hands slowly up and down, I made good use of his morning glory, finally lowering my mouth down and sucking gently, moving my tongue underneath to tease him and getting faster and faster.

He was definitely awake now, his big, strong hand on the back of my head, holding me there but not forcing.

Suddenly a bang from downstairs snapped us both out of a pre orgasmic haze and we froze.

Letting go of him reluctantly, I slid off the bed and threw a silk kimono on, you should always look good whatever the time.

Making my way downstairs I heard Jasper following me and waited a moment for him to come into view.

"Wait" he said, taking my hand and pulling me back whilst brandishing a wooden back scrub in the other hand, "we don't know what's down there."

My heart swelled with love and amusement as my gentle, foolish man went into protective mode and pulled me behind him, holding my hand the entire time.

Silently, we crept downstairs, my heart thudding louder and louder.

As we reached the bottom of the steps however, we discovered the source of the banging noise; the front door was slightly open and was swinging too and fro.

Looking out, we saw two sets of footprints walking away from the door in the snow.

That meant that two people from inside the house had gone on an early morning stroll.

Jasper and I fell about in giggles, laughing at the panic we'd both felt as we'd crept down the stairs, Jasper armed with a back scrubber, to attack whatever intruders we'd found.

I sent Jasper into the kitchen to get a head start on making everyone pancakes and hot chocolate for breakfast, while I went to wake up the rest of the house.

After all, it was Christmas and that meant presents!

**Bpov**

I had travelled on foot to the nearest town and was now waiting for Jake to pick me up in his car.

Looking down the road I saw him sweeping up next to me.

Opening the door from the inside, he said "Get in baby doll" and after I'd shut the door behind me, he drove away.

This was one of the things I loved best about Jake, he understood the importance of silence.

As we rolled through the snow covered forests he stayed quiet and left me to ponder my own thoughts.

I still couldn't understand how all this had happened, I thought he had loved me, but he'd used me and left me.

With a jolt of panic I realised his Christmas present was still under the tree in the house, a watch with the message '_with love from Bella'_ inscribed on the back.

My face flushed with shame as I imagined him laughing at the sentiment but I refused to get Jake to turn back, I'd already ruined his Christmas for him by getting him to pick me up from the middle of nowhere and besides, who knows who else was awake in the house now?

They might insist on knowing what was wrong, and I couldn't bear to admit that I'd fallen into the stereotype of Edward's 'women', especially after all the warnings I'd received.

Dropping me off at the airport, Jake turned to me and asked "Can you talk about it sweetheart?"

I shook my head resignedly and he looked down, disappointed.

"I will, I promise" I told him, "I just need some time Jake, then I'll tell you everything that's happened but please promise me you won't tell them where I've gone, not Alice or Jasper or Emmett or Rosalie and especially not Edward. I just need to be left on my own for some time. Oh, and tell Edward I'm terminating my contract and I know I really should give notice, so I don't expect to be paid for this last month."

My eyes filled with tears as I remembered I was still Edward's employee and I was just his paid whore.

"Are you sure honey?" Jake asked me, with sadness evident in his eyes.

I nodded and he smiled sadly as we hugged one last time for who knows how long, and I walked away, not looking back, towards the airport, towards home.

**Epov**

Jane was right, this meeting was the one that was going to launch me stateside.

I'd signed a new contract for a film they were producing in America, unfortunately Tanya would be co-starring in it with me again but I pushed that unpleasant thought to the back of my mind and tried to focus on the exciting things.

Would I have to move to America?

Would Bella come with me?

What if she refused to?

I don't think I could go without her but how could I force her to leave her friends and family?

My head was full of jumbled thoughts, jumping from one to another.

It was already seven in the evening by the time I got a chance to call her.

As I rang her mobile, it went through to answer phone.

Feeling slightly dejected at this minor setback I went to rang my house phone instead.

As I waited for someone to pick up, a sense of panic ignited in me, what if she was really angry at me for missing Christmas?

Finally someone picked up,

"Hello?"

"Alice, it's Edward"

"Edward! Oh my God where are you? We've been trying to get hold of you all day! You've missed Christmas!"

Cutting through her babbling I said, " I had to go to a meeting back in London, it was really important, I'm sorry. Is Bella..."

But she cut across me again, "You went to a meeting instead of having Christmas and you didn't tell anyone? And you took Bella with you so she missed it too?" Alice screamed,

"I said I was sorry!Wait, what? I don't have Bella, I left her with you!" I whispered, feeling nervous.

"Well she's not here!" Alice screeched, "She's not been here all day, we thought she'd gone with you!"

"Alice, Oh my God, where is she?" I panicked

"Did you do anything or say anything before you left?" Alice questioned.

"Well...we slept together last night," I muttered, feeling abashed, "and I left her a note saying I was sorry but then I had to go, I was already late and it was very last minute!"

"Oh Edward!" Alice shouted at me, "You slept with her and left her a note saying you were sorry? Are you an idiot you stupid dick? What the fuck is she going to think now? No wonder she's taken off and left!"

I'd never heard Alice swear so much in my life!

"Look for her Alice, please!" I begged and then I rang off, I had to find Bella.

Trying her phone again I got through to a recorded message, it was a different one this time though.

It simply said "This number is no longer in use" and rang off.

She'd run away.

My Bella had run away and she was making damn sure I couldn't find her.

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	24. Why would he?

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**Bpov**

As I boarded the aeroplane my tears finally began to fall.

Silently I sat and cried, hot wet tears slipping down my cheeks, the taste of salt left on my lips.

I couldn't believe how stupid I'd been!

I'd heard all the stories and the rumours, I'd seen the evidence of his high libido my self as he slipped in, unannounced, in the early morning, when I'd been sat up all night waiting for him.

I'd felt the pain of watching him flirt with everything with breasts, as I took a back seat.

I hated that he's done this to me, made me believe he wanted me and then left me.

How could I have believed he'd wanted me?

He was a film star, the nation's bad boy, and I was just some girl who happened to work for him.

Just his maid.

I leant back in my seat, closed my eyes and let an uneasy sleep wash over me, full of dreams involving him, and the pain he'd left behind.

Even in sleep I couldn't escape.

**Epov**

Having gone back to the country house to assure myself that Alice had been speaking the truth and she really had gone, I was going out of my mind with worry!

Where was she?

How could she do this to me?

Did she not understand how I felt about her?

What she meant to me?

And she's just upped and taken off with my heart!

But it's my fault, I thought miserably.

What must she think? I slept with her and then left her on Christmas day with just a stupid note, attempting to explain where I'd gone.

And I knew how worried she was about any kind of relationship between me and her, worried that I would take advantage of her, as her employer.

Maybe she was right to be worried, to her it must look like that's exactly what happened.

But I had to explain to her!

Trying to clear my head of all the misery I'd more or less inflicted on myself, I got up and went to shout to my siblings and friends.

"Jazz, I need you to get all the security tapes out of the cameras from last night and this morning and watch them for me please, see if there's anything there.

Alice, could you and Rose ring up all Bella's friends you can think of and see if she's gone to them.

Emmett, can you go down to all the bus and train stations you can find and give them a picture of Bella, see if they've seen her, and get the security tapes off them as well if you can?

Mum, Dad," I looked at my parents, looking down sadly at me.

"Oh Edward" my mum said, "I'm so sorry for you, I know she must be hurt by what happened last night but I'm sure she'll come back to you, she loves you, I saw the love between you, it's not something you can just forget."

"It's gonna be alright son" my dad said, placing a hand on my shoulder, "we're gonna have to take off but we'll stop by the airports and give them a picture of her, see if she's been anywhere around there in the last 24 hours."

"Thanks dad," I croaked, emotion evident in my voice, "I'm just going to drive around and see if I can see her."

"Okay sweetheart," my mother said softly, hugging me goodbye, " tell us as soon as you have news."

And with that, they left.

I drove around for hours and hours, finally parking my car at the side of the road and leaning back in my seat.

It was starting to rain, the raindrops hammering on the roof and sliding down the windscreen.

Looking at my watch I realised it had now been nearly 48 hours since Bella had disappeared.

What if someone had taken her?

She was only little and so beautiful, anyone would want her.

What if she was hurt?

What if she was...dead?

I squeezed my eyes shut tightly, trying to rid myself of this terrible thought,

A tear betrayed me and squeezed out of the corner of my eye, its warm wetness creating a glistening trail down my face.

I don't know how long I was sat in my car but as the sky began to get light again and the morning approached, my phone ringing pulled me out of my dazed stupor.

It was Jasper.

"Hello?" he said down the phone.

"Have you found her?" I gabbled out as fast as I could.

I heard him sigh down the phone and my heart plummeted.

"Edward," he said gently, "there's no easy way to say this but, Bella left only a few hours after you did. Emmett got the security tapes from just about every place in town and one of them shows a black car pulling up next to where Bella was standing and letting her in."

"Did you see who was driving the car?" I interjected, hurriedly.

"I don't know who it was Edward, but it was another man and...they seemed very close."

I clenched my fists and put my head between my knees, reeling at the possibility of Bella's betrayal.

"Edward?...Edward are you still there?"

I heard Jasper's usually calm drawl calling me down the phone.

Letting the phone slip from my grasp onto the car floor I shut my eyes and tried to forget it all.

**Bpov**

As I finally stepped of the plane and breathed in the cool, fresh air I plastered a fake smile on my face.

It had taken hours and hours to get here, here being Forks, Washington, my father's place of residence and the town in which I was born.

Although I really consider myself English, having been both to sixth form college and university there and having gotten rid of my American accent completely, I am in fact American.

Well, half at least, my mother is Italian, hence the name 'Isabella' and the thick dark hair, eyes and lashes.

My father however is a full blooded American and it's from him that I got my pale skin, appreciation of silence and tolerance of the rain, a good thing to have when you live in England.

Charlie and my mom, Renee, split up when I was a kid and my mom now seems to travel the world with her new husband, Phil, so I used to mainly live with my dad.

Don't get me wrong, I loved Charlie and everything, he was quiet but that's how I liked him.

And quiet and unobtrusive is exactly what I need right now.

I had given him a call a few hours ago saying I was coming to see him on a last minute decision, and although he seemed surprised, he was happy enough to see his little girl and said he's pick me up from the airport.

So here I was now, walking into arrivals with no bag of clothes, nothing from my old life at all apart from memories I wish I didn't have.

Charlie was there, dressed in his casual clothes thank god, I hate being with him when he's dressed as a cop, it ruins my attempts at being invisible because everyone stares.

"Hey Bells" he smiled at me and embraced me in a bear hug. "it's good to have you back kiddo, no stuff?" he questioned.

I shook my head and he shrugged and lead me outside to the car, my own old red truck.

I cracked a smile of fondness as I remembered how much I used to love it and how unreliable it was.

"Thought you'd like to see your baby again huh?" my dad smiled at me, catching me looking at the truck.

"Thanks dad" I smiled back at him, slipping easily into my old drawl as he patted me awkwardly on the shoulder and we drove off together.

Going back home again, finally.

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	25. Sweatshirts and not so sweet dreams

**Well here you go, I said I'd write again when I got 200 reviews and you kindly obliged!**

**Hope you like it!**

**Epov**

For days and days I just sat alone in my apartment.

Alice and Emmett rang a couple of times every day, trying to make me go out with them and talk things over.

Alice even came round once and started banging on the door about how I was being an idiot and how there was no way Bella was with another man, I kept ignoring her until she left again.

Finally defeated they more or less left me alone to wallow in my own self pity, with the exception of Emmett bringing me a couple of bottles of Jack every few days.

I had managed to convince myself that Bella was with another man now.

After all, she'd left with another man and it had been a few weeks since anyone had even heard from her.

In some ways the thought that she was with someone else gave me comfort, I wanted her to be happy and seeing as she clearly didn't return my feelings for her I wouldn't have to pursue her and get rejected all over again.

Mainly though I just hated the guy, I wanted to beat his face in, rip him limb from limb for touching my Bella, getting to be with her, getting to feel her around him.

My mind clouded over with these miserable thoughts and I took another swig of Jack.

I looked a mess, unshaven and scruffy, slobbing around in my sweats, every now and then checking in on Bella's old room to see the things she'd left behind there.

Would she come and pick them up herself?

At least then I'd see her again.

But did I want to see her again?

Yes, I decided, I HAD to see her again, it wasn't an option.

I went into Bella's room now and lay down on the bed I'd been sleeping in for the past two weeks, clutching a t-shirt of hers in my hands.

I figured I'd have to start sleeping off the Jack now, I was supposed to be flying to America tomorrow to start preparing for this new film and there was no way they'd let me fly if I was drunk, and I can't imagine Jane would be too impressed either and she's a scary bitch to get on the wrong side of.

Resting my head on the pillow, I fell into a deep, dreamless sleep, the jack still numbing my brain.

**Bpov**

Sometimes I forgot how much I loved Forks.

Everyone I loved in the world was here.

Well.

Nearly everyone.

Me and Jake had grown up here together, so it was kinda bittersweet to be back here without him.

I spent most of my days going to see my old friends, anything that could take my mind off of him.

My dad was still working as Chief of Police so during the day I hung around the Quileute Reservation with the guys and my two girlfriends, Leah and Angela.

Most days we hung out on the beach, chatting around a camp-fire and once or twice they tried to insist I go cliff jumping with them.

No fear of that however, my balance was bad enough on solid ground, never mind flying through mid air!

The guys were generally loud and boisterous, Quil and Sam, Seth, Paul and Embry and of course Angela's Ben, who was a little quieter.

The girls on the other hand were more peaceful and gentle, going along with the guys and laughing at their antics with a lilting smile on their faces.

Once or twice though I was sure I caught them looking at me with expressions of worry and concern.

It was these times when I made my excuses and left the group, going home to Charlie instead to put his dinner on, God knows he needed it, I had no idea what he'd been eating for the past few years but by the look of the inedible slop he served me the other day, it was a surprise he was still alive!

I didn't want to talk about what was wrong with me.

I knew people knew something was up.

The screams of terror every night as I awoke from another nightmare, sobbing in Charlie's arms, the distant, sad expression I seemed to wear permanently, the way even the guys could sense when something was wrong and all rallied around me, threatening to break the face of whoever did it.

I guess they had all figured it was about a guy then.

I was losing weight rapidly, just picking at my food instead of eating and I had less and less energy everyday.

People said time was a great healer.

Well I don't know how much time they though you should have but to me, the time made everything worse and worse.

It gave me the opportunity to mull everything over, to wonder what I could have done wrong, but it never gave me time to forget his face, the same face I saw in my dreams, my nightmares, day after day.

I still had his sweatshirt, the one with his name on the back.

I slept in it every night, feeling the warmth around me and pretending it has him, inhaling the pepper and citrus smell of him, because I knew, someday that scent would be gone.

And so would he.

**Epov**

Eurgh...I felt awful!

My attempt at staving of a hangover by drinking pints of water hadn't worked, and as I got up I felt the room spinning round me as my head pounded.

The loud shrill of a phone felt like it was boring a hole into my skull.

Stumbling across the room I picked it up and snapped "Yes?"

"Edward where the hell are you?"

It was Jane,

"The plane sets off in just over two hours, you need to be at check in in the next half an hour!"

"I'm coming, I'm coming!" I moaned, shielding my eyes from the natural light streaming in from the window.

"You better be!" yelled Jane and then she slammed the phone down.

Groaning I threw a few things in a bag and stumbled out of the apartment, locking the door behind me.

I didn't care that I barely had anything with me and I was still dressed in the sweats I slept in, Bella's balled up t-shirt clutched in my hand as a reminder that she was real and I didn't just dream her, I would send for the rest of the things later, Jane would just have to cope with me like this.

Banging my way down the stairs I ran into James at the bottom.

"Edward! You look shit man!" he gasped.

"Thanks for the vote of confidence" I muttered, as he opened the door for me and led me out to the car that was already waiting to take me to the airport.

A half our later I strode into the airport, still turning heads in my dishevelled state and trying to command the room without looking like I'd been dragged through a hedge backwards.

That was until Jane saw me, let out a shriek and hit me across her chest with her handbag.

"Oww!" I moaned, "What was that for?"

"Edward Cullen! I can't take you to America when you look like you've been living in a bin for two weeks! Give me your things, I'll check you in, now go and have a shower in the airport showers. Jessica,' she said, turning to one of her assistants, ' Go and find a suit for Mr Cullen in the airport shops and whilst you're there pick up some breath mints, you reek of alcohol" she said pointedly, looking again at me.

Jessica smirked and sidled off, I decided at that point I didn't like her, all plastic and blond and fake and simpering, not like Bella.

Not like my Bella.

**Well what did you think?**

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**Leaving you stupid notes and then taking off without a word?**

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**:)**


	26. No use crying over spilt coffee!

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**

**Keep sending in your comments and suggestions, every little helps.**

****

Epov

The flight there had been long and tedious.

All I wanted to do was slump back in my seat and catch forty winks but no, clearly that was too much to ask.

I was uncomfortable as it is in the suit Jessica had picked out for me, it was cheap and itchy, there was no way Jane would have only given her enough money for a cheap suit, so she must have picked the first thing she'd seen and  
pocketed the rest of the cash herself!

Thieving Bitch.

But no, to add to my discomfort, Jessica kept sidling over me during the flight, trying to sit down in the spare seat next to me I always reserve for my bags and continuously leaning over me so her fake, plastic tits were in my face, the powerful stench of her perfume making my eyes water.

I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose, trying to calm down and just ignore the stupid woman but I finally snapped when she pretended to trip and flung herself on me, spilling orange juice all over me and then trying to dab it off in a would be sensuous manner.

I pushed her off me and started yelling at her to leave off,

Jane came over to me at this point and threatened that if I didn't shit up soon someone was going to make a story of this, I could see some passengers had already got their cameras out to record 'famous' Edward Cullen's meltdown.

I took a few deep breaths in, calming my anger, then sank back against my seat, closing my eyes and drifting into an uneasy sleep for the rest of the journey.

****

Bpov

Looking in the mirror at myself I looked absolutely awful.

I was far paler than usual, my face was becoming gaunt and my bones seemed to jut out more prominently, I was still throwing up and my periods had disappeared.

It had only been a few months since I'd seen him but you'd have hoped I'd have managed to find some closure by now but clearly not.

Sighing, I tried to make the best of what I had.

Throwing my hair up into an untidy knot on top of my head, I put a little concealer and mascara on to try and liven my face up and then I left the house, tying my waitress' apron on behind me.

I had got a job at the café Angela's mom owned to try and earn a little money to pay back to Charlie, seeing as I was intruding on his life.

He kept insisting it wasn't necessary but I felt awful otherwise, I hated the loss of independence it gave me.

I was incredibly grateful to Mrs Webster for giving me the job on such short notice.

She'd known me as a child and had always been very friendly and caring but she had now been added to the list of people who looked at me and then shook their head, with a sorrowful expression on their face.

I seemed to have become the emblem of misery, it was a cloak I couldn't take off and I hid all my tears behind it, trying to show as little sadness as possible on my face.

Today at work though there was an electric atmosphere in the air.

Everywhere I looked people were whispering and giggling, with looks of great excitement on their faces.

I soon found out why.

After a quick greeting and an inquiry about my health, "You're looking terribly thin dear", Mrs Webster cut straight to the chase.

"There's a film crew coming to down to film in the forest and up on the cliffs in the reservation! Isn't it exciting?" she gushed.

The idea of anything to do with film stars sent a fresh wave of nausea through me and my face was briefly paralysed with grief, but I rescued it, pulling my mouth into a painful smile and asking politely what the film was about.

"Oh I could never be sure dear" chattered Mrs Webster, " I think it is to be something to do with pirates and romance. Gosh, the things that attract the young today!" and she wandered off, rambling and chuckling to herself.

****

Epov

Eurgh this day is going from bad to worse!

First I couldn't get rid of Jessica's advances, now I'm being told that I have to make it look like I'm in a relationship with bloody Tanya because the director things if the co-stars are in a relationship the film will appeal to American audiences more.

Not only that but I'd been told the majority of the filming was taking place in some small town on the outskirts of Washington called Forks.

Now firstly, Forks is frankly a ridiculous name, I mean for fucks sake, is it's neighbouring town Spoons? Do they reside in the county of Knives?

But secondly, I'd been told in rains most of the bloody time!

The supposedly good American weather was just about the only reason I was willing to jet off on that damned plane away from England in the first place!

If the film wanted rain we should have bloody well stayed there!

We'd been put up in a hotel on the edge of the town, which in all intents and purposes seemed nice enough, but to aid the idea that me and Tanya were together, she'd been put in the room next door.

Even now I could hear her knocking on the door and calling me in that high, screechy, nasal voice of hers.

Well I'd be damned if I was going to talk to her, I had some much needed deep sleep to catch up on and I intended to do it now.

The only problem was every time I closed my eyes I saw her, my Bella.

My beautiful, radiant Bella with her soft, dark curls, tumbling down her back, her big, dark eyes framed by such thick, black lashes, that darkened every time she looked up at me beseechingly, and her peaches and cream skin that flushed the most delicate shade of pink at my touch.

And then I remembered her betrayal.

****

Bpov

The film crew had apparently been in town all week but I hadn't seen hide nor hair of them.

Not that I wanted to mind, the very idea of associating with anyone who might remind me of him, crushed my soul a little inside.

I kept myself busy, working as many shifts as I could, spending my free time at the reservation, trying to fool myself as much as others that I was getting over him and getting healthy again.

They all knew the truth even if I chose to believe the lie.

I went over to clear a customer's table as they'd just left, when something caught my eye.

The front page of a shiny, glossy magazine showed what could possibly be described as my worst fear; a picture of him and that whore co-star of his Tanya, together with the headline "**Hollywood's Sweethearts back on?" **

Feeling my knees give way, I sunk to the floor in shock, knocking the half empty coffee mug over in the process and watching the liquid seep over the pages, slowly dissolving the paper.

As his face became unrecognisable due to the damage, tears blurred my vision and I started to cry in front of people for the first time, sobbing as I thought back on everything I'd lost, what it could have been and how much I did, and still  
do, love him.

****

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	27. Look to the cliffs

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**Over the next few chapters we're going to have the meeting and possible reconciliation of Edward and Bella.**

**Excited? ;)**

**Epov**

We'd been filming for nearly a month now, the hectic schedule I had to keep to kept me busy throughout the day so my mind couldn't wander, but at night, as I laid alone in my bed looking up at the ceiling, I couldn't help letting my mind drift to Bella.

I wondered how she was, if she had changed at all, whether she had found someone new or was with the man she'd been seen driving off with.

I always tried to stop thinking then, I didn't want those thoughts in my mind, poisoning my dreams, my Bella with a faceless man, holding him, touching him, loving him.

The director was still insisting I was seen about with Tanya, to gain publicity for the film.

I hated having to attend publicity events with her hanging off my arm, simpering and fawning over everyone in a sickly sweet manner and then changing entirely when we were alone, becoming a demanding bitch, insisting we should be a real couple and maintaining the ridiculous idea she had got into her head that I desperately wanted her was true.

Groaning, I lifted my head off the pillow I'd been resting on and got up, yawning and stretching out all my limbs, putting a hand to my stubble covered chin and rubbing it subconsciously.

Deciding I couldn't be bothered to do anything about it, I threw on a hoodie over my sweats and moped out of the room and through the front door, hands in pockets, deciding to go on a walk through the surrounding forest we were supposed to be filming in later today.

Tramping through the woodland I breathed in the musty, wet smell of the trees and earth, feeling it clear my head and feeling more relaxed than I had done for weeks, this was clearly something I should do more often.

Climbing up the sloping hillside I started to feel warmer, streams of sunlight were bursting through the trees and igniting the forest with colour.

Striding out of the cloud bank that seemed to constantly linger on the town below, I felt my breath catch in my chest.

Looking out before me I could see the most exquisite site I had ever beheld.

A meadow filled with thick lush green grass and scattered with fragrant wild flowers was spread out before me, lit up in the bright early morning sun.

Beyond that I could see the treacherous grey sea, throwing waves against the cliffs surrounding part of it.

Laying down on my back in the meadow I rested my arms behind my head and focussed in on the cliffs opposite me. There were people standing on them, mainly russet coloured men I thought although it was difficult to tell as many of them seemed to have thick black hair falling down their backs.

However, I was sure I could make out someone else, a tiny slight, pale figure, with dark curls whipping around her in the wind, looking as if one good gust could blow her away.

I watched them for a while, shocked at first when some of the men started throwing themselves off the cliff, but then realising that it must be that cliff jumping I'd heard about in town.

Watching closer I saw how they timed their jumps perfectly, hitting the water as the wave hit and drew them away from the cliff side and the rocks.

I kept my eye on the small woman however, she resembled Bella too much for my liking even if I

knew it couldn't be her.

She made me anxious, standing so close to the edge all the time.

It was still relatively early, about ten am and so I expected to get a couple of hours alone without the human contact that seemed intent on hounding me.

However, not only half an hour later my phone started buzzing in my pocket.

Taking it out and flipping it open with a sigh I changed my attitude as I saw my brother in law, Jasper's, name flash up on the screen.

"Hey man how are you?" I asked in the most jovial manner I could muster.

"Hey Edward, I have news" Jasper replied and then continued on without pausing or given me a chance to reply.

"That man we saw Bella go off with, it wasn't some randomer, it was her friend Jacob. Alice ran into him and your doorman James yesterday and forced him into telling her anything he knew about her disappearance. Anyway, he cracked after Alice threatened him with a number of things, including the removal and disposal of his balls with a potato peeler," he paused to chuckle to himself, "and apparently he picked her up and drove her to the airport, although he claims he doesn't know why, says she wouldn't tell him what was wrong, and says she's gone to America to stay with her father, lives in some funny small town place in Washington, Knives or something like that..."

"Forks?" I chocked out in a strangled whisper.

"Yeah, Forks! That was the one!" Jasper cried out, happily.

I felt the phone slip from my fingers and fall to the floor, hearing Jasper continue to chatter away to himself before the phone flipped shut and cut him off.

I stood there frozen, not knowing what to do.

Bella, my Bella had been closer to me than I ever realised for weeks, closer than I could have ever imagined.

**TanyaPov**

God I hated this small town dump, barely anyone knew who I was, usually all I would have to do would be step out of my front door before people flocked around me, offering to get me anything I wanted.

As it was, I was having to walk on my own to some crappy little coffee house at eight in the fucking morning to get my own damned skinny latte.

Sitting down at a table as close to the other customers as I could, trying to get one of them to recognise me and take my picture, I waited for someone to come and take my order.

Glancing around I saw the only woman who seemed to work there was taking orders from behind the counter, she looked vaguely familiar somehow..

Anyway, I didn't care, I wasn't just somebody, I was Tanya Denali, and she could come to me to take my order.

I looked down at my nails and studied them carefully for a few minutes before I heard somebody sigh and walk over to me, their crappy little pumps brushing softly against the floor.

Looking up at her I suddenly recognized her, Edward's old assistant or something, the hired help at any rate.

I'd heard she'd disappeared into the night so what was she doing here?

Looking her up and down I spotted the reason.

However thin the little whore may be the tiny, yet perfectly formed bump protruding slightly from her stomach was unmistakably not a food baby.

Scandal I thought to myself as I sneered up at her and whipped out my phone.

**Epov**

I stood there, still and frozen for a couple of minutes, still trying to take in everything I had just heard.

The sound of a text coming through to my phone snapped me out of it and I bent down to pick it up eagerly, hoping it was Jasper with more news on Bella.

Instead it was Tanya.

Sighing I clicked open the text which read,

_'Who knocked up your assistant?'_

What? I thought to myself.

Where had that come from?

So Lauren had got herself pregnant had she?

I always knew she was a slag but why would I care?

The only way it would affect me is that she would no longer be able to work for me, and I took that as a blessing.

Unless it wasn't Lauren Tanya was talking about.

It was then I looked up at the cliffs in time to see the young woman fall...

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	28. Is death like this?

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**

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**More reviews = more chapters!**

Bpov

Things were getting a little better.

I'd stopped being miserable all the time and started trying to spend more time with my friends.

I figured if I threw myself back into life then I could fool myself everything was okay.

I couldn't stop the inevitable dreams I still had each night but in a way I didn't want to, there were the only thing I had to remind myself that this was all real, that he was real.

And although it hurt to remember, there was no way I wanted to forget!

Slipping into my waitress' uniform, I brushed my curls back away from my face and tied up the apron ribbon behind me.

It was definitely getting a little tighter, that should please my friends I thought to myself, they had been moaning about how thin and pale I'd gotten but clearly I was putting a little weight back on, trying to eat properly again, despite the

fact that I was surrounded by delicious looking cakes and buns at the coffee shop all day.

I was only working the early morning shift this morning, it was supposed to be my day off but I was called in to cover a shift for another waitress who'd rung in sick.

I didn't mind, it gave me plenty to do, the people were all really friendly and I would still have time to go up to the cliffs later that morning to watch the guys practising their cliff jumping.

It had been slow this morning, and I was nearing the end of my shift.

Mind you, it was always slow from six am to nine, it was only really business men who came in at that point to get an early morning caffeine shot before they started work, and Forks being the size it is, there wasn't exactly many business

men.

Hearing the bell ring as the door swung open, I turned around, feeling a sudden whoosh of cold air wash over me. As my eyes fell on the person who'd just come in, my heart sank.

It was Tanya.

She stalked straight over to a table and stared up at me, her eyes seeming to recognise me for a moment, but then she looked down again and started messing with her nails, the stupid cow knew you had to order at the counter and

she was trying to make me go to her, like the 'hired help' she'd always said I was.

I left it for a few minutes, determined not to give in to her demands but after a while my professional instinct kicked in, and with a sigh I shuffled over to her. She smirked at me, realising she had won and it that moment the flash of

recognition I'd been dreading appeared in her eyes and she smirked even more, looking me up and down, sneering as she took in my slightly fuller body shape, compared to her own toned, muscular abs.

At that moment I mentally resigned my self to losing more weight, clearly I looked awful.

I took her order, made it up and brought it back to her without saying a word.

Thankfully by that time my shift was over and more staff were arriving, so I could slip out of the back door, my tears unnoticed by anyone.

By the time I'd clambered up to the cliff tops, all that remained of my tears was an unnoticeable salt trail down each cheek, and I greeted my friends with smiles, laughing as they picked me up and spun me round and squealing and hitting

them when they pretended to hold me over the cliff edge.

I had nothing against cliff jumping, I could see why people liked it, the rush was exhilarating, however it wasn't for me. The rocks at the bottom always panicked me a little too much to jump off and the guys knew my fear and never tried

to pressure me into it.

I stood atop the cliffs, the wind buffeting me around, laughing and smiling with everyone else mess around on the cliffs. At one point I looked over to the meadow opposite us, surrounded by trees and thought a saw something shine, like

when the sun catches the face of a watch, but there didn't seem to be anything there so I put it out of my mind.

We spent most of the morning at the cliffs, but when the wind started to pick up we decided it was time to think about heading back to the reservation.

Seth, the youngest of my friends convinced us to stay for just a few more moments however, whilst he tried to show us a new trick he'd been perfecting, where he scaled down the cliff side a little and then pushed off it to back flip into

the water. The wind was really strong now and the guys were sitting down with their legs dangling over the edge, looking down at Seth and laughing as he seemed to lose his nerve and panic.

I giggled with the rest of them, craning my head to see what was going on. I stood up to get a better angle to look down at and all of a sudden, a huge gust of wind caused me to stumble, and losing my footing i fell over the edge of the cliff.

The sensation of falling was unlike anything I'd ever known.

In a way it was kind of peaceful, the sense of weightlessness as the air buffeted me around and the only thing I could hear was my own scream, but even that seemed distant, as if it were miles away, nowhere near me and my dream like

state.

When I hit the water the only thing I registered was silence. It was like how I'd imagined death, dark, empty and silent.

It was only as I broke the surface that I realised how cold it was, heard the shouts and yells of the guys up on the cliff, felt the breathlessness in my body, and the sticky, warm sensation on my head.

Attempting to tread water, I reached up and put my hand to my head, trying to figure out where the warmth was coming from. Drawing it away I saw the blood. Red and thick, dripping from my fingers into the salt water, creating a pool

around me, and with that I shut my eyes and entered the silence once more.

Epov

My heart stopped in the moment I saw her fall, it was if time had slowed down, as I watched her drift steadily to the water and smack against the rocks.

The shouts and cries of the men up on the cliff broke me out of my shock and confirmed all my fears.

They were shouting for Bella.

With that I started to run, across the meadow and around to the cliff, my eyes constantly trained on the spot where Bella had hit the water and not reappeared.

Ripples broke the water as the men on the cliff dived in, swimming under the water, looking for her.

With my head throbbing and my heart pounding, sweat dripping from my brow as I reached the beach where the tide broke upon, the only thing I could think of is 'what will I do if she's gone?'

Thanks for reading guys!

**I hope you like it!**

**Please review and tell me what you want to happen next.**

**Next chapter will be the big reunion but how should it play out?**

**Will Bella's head injury cause her to lose her memory?**

**Will their baby survive?**

**Will Edward accept the baby?**

**Will Bella?**

**Review!**


	29. Wires and wishes

**Thanks for the reviews guys they were all very encouraging :)**

**I know a lot of this is very far fetched but hey, it's a story, as long as we can enjoy imagination who needs real life?**

**Anyway, hope you enjoy this next bit, I know you've all been waiting for the meeting!**

**Epov  
**

Running to the sea, I started wading in, pushing my way through, against the tide.

All my thoughts were focussed on Bella.

A loud cry from one of the men caused me to look his way sharply,

he had Bella, cradling her to him as if she were a baby.

The rest of the men gathered round him, and they started to make their way back to shore,

I followed them, running to keep up.

As I got closer I could see Bella in better definition.

She looked awful, although her beauty still haunted her face, like a sad memory.

She was thin and gaunt, paler than I had ever seen her, curled in this man's arms, head resting against his chest.

Her cheekbones and hips jutted out and there were dark circles around her eyes and her hair was matted...

with a sickening jolt I realised that her hair was matted not only with sea water but also with blood.

Streams of red, making their way down her rescuer's chest, dripping onto the wet sand and dispersing as he laid her down gently.

The men all clamoured around her, jostling each other to get closer to her, calling her name and gently shaking her to try and wake her.

Pushing my way through, they finally noticed me.

Shouts of indignation and resentment, as I pulled Bella into my arms, filled my ears but I ignored them.

Resting my love's body on my lap, I willed her to wake up.

Hugging her close to me, I cradled her cheek in my hand.

Her eyes flickered open in the briefest, most delicate motion.

Clouded with pain and sorrow, her dark, soulful eyes gazed up at me in recognition.

"Edward?"

The question had barely left her lips in a rattling breath, when her eyes softly closed and she fell back against me.

My tears now added to the blood pooling around us, and the men stayed silent as I buried my face in my love's hair and cried.

****

Bpov

Pain like nothing I had ever known filled me.

The shock of the fall seemed to have worn off now and as I sank deeper into the salt water the pain in my head started to hit me.

It felt like I was burning, like everything was broken,

I opened my eyes, feeling the sting of the salt water and saw the dark blood mass around me, swirling, and trapping me in its deep, metallic, red hue.

Feeling sickness well up inside me, I closed my eyes and entered the blackness once more.

There were no more thoughts after that, just feelings as I felt myself sink lower and lower.

I could vaguely register moving up, the cold, harsh wind, tearing at my skin as I felt the water leave me.

Finally I seemed to stop moving, laying still on a soft, wet surface.

Was this death?

Laying in the blackness, my thoughts started to come back to me.

What was I supposed to do now?

Something had changed in the air around me, a memory, hidden deep within me was re-surfacing.

That scent...

the scent I fell asleep to every night for weeks, wrapped warm in its material, until it had to be washed, and the scent of him faded away.

I wept that day, the day I realised he was gone, that I had nothing left of him, no memory at all.

His scent overwhelmed me and I felt familiar arms fold around me, holding me close.

I felt tears well in my eyes now, their warm wetness stinging me and forcing me to open my eyelids, this must be my heaven, the universe paying for all the crimes they committed against me in life.

Looking up, I saw his beautiful face gaze down at me.

Those dark, green eyes boring into my soul, filling with dears of their own.

His ruffled bronze hair, windswept and messy.

I felt him cradle me, felt his fingers brush against my cheek in a loving caress.

It was then I breathed his name,

the first time I had said it aloud since I ran from him all those months ago,

"Edward"

****

Epov

I stayed with her the whole time, no more tears filled my eyes but my soul was gone, dead inside me as I watched her laying there on a hospital bed, wires filling her, lifeless.

I had rung the gang and they had flown over on the first flight they could.

The men Bella had been turned out to be her childhood friends.

Although they quite obviously didn't approve of me, and quite rightly so, I didn't, after all, know what Bella had told them about me, they allowed me my time alone with her as they went back to their own families to give updates.

Her father, Chief Swan, had been in earlier, a strong looking man, reduced to tears as he stood, pale as a sheet, looking at the lifeless form that was his only child.

Alice had come to sit with me for a while, whilst the others checked into a hotel, her hand resting on my shoulder as she attempted to console me.

I never spoke a word to any of them.

The whole time I kept my eyes trained on Bella, or rather, part of Bella.

I don't know how I didn't see it before, but as she was laid out like the dead before me, the tiny bump protruding from her stomach was obvious for all to see.

My baby.

Our baby.

I thought back to earlier when I had first seen her, remembering my first impressions of her pale, wasted frame.

Silent sobs racked through my body as I took her hand in mine, holding it, warming it.

Please let our baby live, let both of them live...

**Well I hope you like it!**

**I know it wasn't the joyous reunion a lot of you wanted, but I promise the angst will stop soon!**

**Review please, tell me what you want to happen next,**

**how will Edward tell Bella about the baby she's been denying for so long?**

**Will she accept it?**

**Will she agree to stay with Edward or will she go back without him?**

**Review!**

**Thanks **

**:)**


	30. What are best friends for?

**I know it's been a while since I updated, sorry for the wait!  
**

**Anyway, hope you like it :)**

Bpov

Beep

…...

Beep

…...

Beep

…...

The sound filled my head like a beat, my eyes closed as I lay in darkness, bright lights swirling around in front of them, dancing to the beat.

I was warm but I don't think I was comfortable.

I seemed sort of stiff, held down in one place.

I could feel the soft bed below me and the sheet pulled over me, itching slightly as the tag rubbed against me.

The itching suddenly became unbearable and I went as if to scratch it...

or at least I tried to, my body didn't seem to be responding to what my mind was telling it to do.

Weird, I thought to myself.

I checked over my body, trying to experimentally wiggle my toes and move upwards.

Nothing was moving but I could feel it all, the stillness was infuriating.

Focussing on different parts of my body, new sensations began to emerge, presenting themselves to me.

A continuous dull ache in my right hand, the kind you get when you cut your finger and it won't stop hurting, even when there's no more blood coming out.

A constant blackness in my head, a dizzy feeling almost, that seemed to be making even more pain, and a tickling around my neck, my hair was brushing against me.

I wished someone would tie it up for me, I was starting to go mad with all the itches and discomfort!

My stomach hurt a little too, although I couldn't pinpoint the pain, it wasn't specifically significant, but it was unlike anything I'd ever felt before.

I heard a door opening and a breeze blew into the room as it filled with noises from outside.

I could hear people chatting and babbling, some sounded like they were crying, but mostly it sounded busy.

The familiar click of someone's heels clattered against the floor as they walked towards me.

Where had I heard them before?

"Hello Bella, darling!" a high pitch voice chirruped.

Alice.

I suddenly felt happier than I'd felt in a long time, a warm feeling spreading over me as I realised how much I'd missed her.

"Hey sweetheart!"she squealed, and I heard her tutting.

"God look at that awful hospital gown they put you in, are they trying to make you look like an old woman? I have something that will look much cuter!"

I laughed inside, even at a point like this when I was trapped inside my body, locked away in a hospital, Alice was ever fashion conscious, trying to fix the world with a good outfit.

"Now Bella, seeing as you're being difficult and not opening your eyes for me like a good girl, I'll just have to describe your outfit to you. First of all I'm going to take off this ridiculous gown and burn it."

I felt her lifting me gently and slipping my arms out of the sleeves,before pulling it away from underneath me.

I was suddenly very aware I was laying there with very few clothes on.

"Now Bella" Alice started again, "I knew you'd be all self conscious, so I've let the doctors know I'm here and what I'm doing and I've locked the door so no one can come in until I've finished. Here, now I've got the most gorgeous dark

blue silk number to put you in, there's some amazing heels for it too, it's just a shame you can't walk" she muttered disapprovingly.

I felt the cool silk slide over my body, it felt very loose fitting and went down to just above my knees.

"Now I'm going to do your make up and curl your hair"

"That's my job" another voice shouted and I heard a banging on the door.

Rosalie.

Muttering darkly about how she knew best, Alice went to open the door.

Suddenly I wanted to cry, I'd missed my best friend so much and now here she was.

"Bella!"she squealed, "Ooo I've got so much to tell you!" and I felt her arms wrap round me in an embrace.

"Nice choice on the dress by the way" she commented to Alice, "Now, Alice, you take her make up and I'll start on her hair while we fill her in with what she's missed."

I heard Alice chuckle and felt the soft bristles of a powder brush sweep across my face.

"Bells, me and Em have moved in together! Isn't it amazing? I never thought I could put up with any man long enough let alone a big oaf like him but he's such a gentleman at heart! He's just having to learn to keep to my rules"

I grinned inside at the thought of Emmett having to learn how to arrange the throw cushions just as Rose liked them.

"By the way, have I told you how mad I am at you yet that you took off without any word to anyone? We're your best friends Bella!"

"Yeah Bella!" Alice chipped in, "We were all going mad when you left, I thought Edward might end up topping himself, he was so distraught. When Jazz came back and told us you'd been seen leaving in a car with another man, Edward

just let his world collapse around him, wouldn't eat or sleep or talk to anyone, just sat and drank all day, blamed himself completely, thought you'd gone off with another man straight away just because he couldn't be with you on

Christmas day."

What? I thought to myself, another man?

Jazz had seen me leave with another man?

Damn! I mentally hit myself on the forehead, it was Jake!

Of course!

Jasper wouldn't know him too well, wouldn't recognize him, having only seen him once or twice.

And Edward thought I had been cheating.

Now I felt guilty.

But even so, he had left without saying why, just leaving that stupid 'sorry' note.

"And then he kept going on about some note" Alice babbled on,

"said he'd tried to tell you he'd had to go up to London last minute to secure a film deal and didn't want to wake you, but ended up not having time to write the note properly because he was too busy

watching you sleep" she shuddered in disgust.

Okay, now I felt really bad.

Why hadn't I stayed to hear Edward's side of the story?

Why had I taken off so quickly, convinced he'd just used you.

I felt so stupid.

If I could cry I would be doing right now.

I felt a stinging, wet sensation in my eyes and trails of warmth made their way down my cheeks, maybe I could cry after all.

"Shit!" Rose cried out "Alice, she's crying! She can hear us, she must be able to hear us!"

Grabbing my shoulders she started shaking me, "Bella! Bella! Can you hear me? Wake up Bella!"

I heard Alice run across the room and fling the door open, "Edward!" she shouted, "Edward, come quick!"

I heard someone running down the corridor outside and the the crash of the door as it was slammed wide open.

A familiar scent filled the room as I opened my eyes.

There he was, in all his glory, tired and dishevelled looking with dark circles under his eyes,but as handsome as the day I met him.

"Bella" he croaked out, his soft, smooth voice like music to my ears.

"Edward" I heard myself say, my voice barely louder than a whisper.

"Edward, I'm sorry"

Well I hope you liked it everyone!

**Everyone is back together again, although Bella still doesn't know about the baby.**

**Now for all you mums out there, I want to know about any cravings you had during your pregnancy,**

**and for anyone else, I'm after baby names, **

**one boys name and one girls.**

**Submit your favourites and I'll choose the best!**

**REVIEW!**

Thanks :)


	31. A step away from crazy

**Thanks for the reviews guys, I know it's been a while since I've updated.**

****

Thanks especially for your review, Mr 'Tarquin' Alex Barber ;) , yes, I am interested in sex, just not with you, not even when we were together :)

****

Hope you enjoy! 

****

Epov

It had been a few weeks since Bella had been let out of hospital, following her coma.

At first things were difficult, there was no real way of hiding her pregnancy to her as soon as she saw herself in the mirror, and she didn't take it well.

Mainly she just tried to convince herself that she'd just put on weight and she wasn't pregnant at all, however, in the few times I'd been allowed to see her, once or twice I'd caught her cradling her swollen stomach and muttering soft

words to it.

She was staying with her father in America for the time being, and he, along with others, was very wary about my access to her, understandable I guess, given the circumstances, but that didn't mean to say I liked it.

Alice and Rose had stayed with Bella, guarding her ferociously, refusing to let anyone utter an unkind word around her, for fear of her current mental state.

They didn't want me seeing her, afraid that I push her too far and upset her.

It was becoming unbearable, I needed to see her, alone, needed to apologise and make it all better, hear her side of the story and understand what possessed her to leave me so suddenly, after we had become so close.

I spent most of my time with Jasper right now, moaning to him about the restrictions Alice and Rosalie had put me under.

Emmett had had to return to England, to keep the work moving along but due to the correlations between mine and Alice's work, Alice had chosen to stay in America for the time being and wild horses wouldn't drag Jasper away from his

wife.

My filming had just about wrapped up in America now and I knew I would have to return home soon but being in a separate house from Bella is hard, being on a different continent is unthinkable and Bella wasn't making any indications of

wanting to return home to England.

There had to be some way I could extend my visit to America, even if it was only by a few weeks.

I knew I had a few promotional tours to so about the upcoming film but that was it.

Even the paparazzi seemed to be getting a little bored of taking pictures of me and Tanya together, as the director insisted, to help promote the film.

My only other irritation was Tanya's assistant, Jessica.

She continued to hound me, insisting on being with me at every possible opportunity, like a fly that I was itching to swat.

However, my attention had to be focused on Bella right now, I couldn't let myself get distracted.

****

Jessica Pov

Mmm it's only a matter of time, I thought to myself, he'll come to you.

I spent all my time with Mr. Cullen, or Edward, as I referred to him in my head.

I know he'd prefer it that way, he'd want me to call him Edward, want to be with me, but it was difficult right now, he had to pretend to be there for some past hookup who'd tried to kill herself.

It was all for publicity, I was sure, he'd get more fans that way, middle aged women cooing over what a martyr he was, and teenage girls wanting him to rescue them.

Well, he was mine.

I just had to find a way of letting the rest of the world know that, and letting him, Edward, know that I was happy for us to move further into our relationship.

I'd seen the looks he gave me, his eyes almost pained looking, the desperation in them, wanting me.

I smoothed over situations when he snapped at me, knowing he was just tense at having to keep us a secret, having to resist me.

Let's face it, who could resist me?

Anyway, it looked like I'd found the perfect solution to my problem.

I'd been with Tanya the other day, doing her chores for her and listening to her bitch, silently seething at her words of displeasure against my beloved Edward, when something she said caught my interest.

Apparently, she had known this girl Edward was 'caring' for from England, and had known she was pregnant long before Edward did, but hadn't told him straight off, to teach him a lesson.

She claimed that this girl, Bella or something, her name was, had whored herself out to Edward and was now either pregnant with his baby or some other 'mystery' man, and the reason Edward was hanging around her was because of

some false idea of 'love' he was portraying for her, so as to keep his name clean, should the baby be his.

Well of course I knew that the baby wasn't his, my Edward would never betray me like that!

But, if I went to the reporters and just let them know that this girl wasn't having Edward's baby, and sneak in a little white lie and say I was, in fact, pregnant with Edward's baby, this girl would be warned off and the rest of the world

would be shown he was taken.

Edward would probably even thank me!

Not only would our relationship be able to continue out in the open, he would practically be forced to spend all his time with me, for the sake of public interest!

****

Bpov

I love him.

There's no way around it.

But he has his own life, his own career and I, I have my family.

I was going to stay with my father, in America, and let Edward disappear, let him continue with his own life.

I was just going to keep one little piece of him behind.

****

Thanks for reading!

**I know it's very late.**

**If you continue to review I'll make sure my updates are more regular :)**

**Thank you again for your 'review' Alex, I look forward to the next one and I'm sure I'll see you soon.**

**:)**


	32. Lies and Slander!

**I know it's been so long and I'm sorry!  
**

**I quite literally lost the plot at one point but I'm trying to get back on track now so any  
**

**Suggestions of where the story should head would be great!**

****

Epov

'Edward'

I was sat in an armchair, my head in my hands. I was tired, so tired, I couldn't even begin to think about the level of exhaustion that had crept over me the past few days. I was tired of being the bad guy, tired of the world thinking it knew my story, headlines shouting out about my 'mystery woman', I was tired of Tanya's assistant, Jessica, coming on to me all the time, I was tired of feeling the pitying stares of my siblings as they watched over me, but most of all, I was physically tired.

Bella had been allowed out of hospital to go and stay with her dad and I spent most of time watching over her, although I was only allowed to be with her whilst she was sleeping, so as not to cause her any stress. Luckily for me, she was asleep most of the time, but it saddened me to think that she didn't know I was here for her, that I had come and I was going to stay.

The times when she was awake were even worse, I had to go back to the little apartment Alice was renting with Jasper but I still couldn't rest, I paced around the rooms, worrying that she'd want me and that I wouldn't be there, or even worse, that she wouldn't want me at all.

'Edward'

The only silver lining to all my tension was that filming was over and Tanya, along with Jessica had returned to England, and so I didn't have to put up with either of their advances and Jane had agreed to inform the media that Tanya and I were no longer 'together', as if we ever were in the first place.

'EDWARD'

Alice's voice cut through my thoughts and reluctantly I looked up and acknowledged her, wanting instead to remain in my head, where at least I knew my ideal situations were a possibility.

'Edward' she said softly, tentatively, 'have you seen the headlines of today's paper?'

An icy cold filled the inside of me, whatever this was it couldn't be good.

I gingerly held out my hand for the glossy pages she was holding and just as slowly she handed it over, unwilling, it seemed, to let go, for fear of the consequences.

She was right to be unwilling.

_**'SECRET CULLEN LOVE CHILD!'**_

the headline screamed at me, for one fleeting moment I thought it was about Bella, but flicking through the pages it became worse. Jessica, it seemed, had fabricated an entire affair between us, claiming we had a deep and powerful love for each other and that I was the father of her unborn child. There was even a sickening photo of her, thrusting out her 'bump' with a simpering expression on her face, and claiming that if I didn't come back to her then everyone would know I'd abandoned my baby.

Reading on, I felt bile rising in my throat. This foul woman had gone as far as to claim that Bella, my Bella, had trapped me in a lie, claiming her unborn 'bastard' child was mine, in order to get fame and wealth. The media has even managed to procure a picture of Bella, looking thin and pale but still with an obvious bump, outside her fathers' house.

Fury like I had never felt before, with a growl I threw the magazine to the floor, uncaring that Alice had scuttled backwards, away from me, afraid, and Jasper had come in to hover protectively in front of her. They both looked startled, this was the most active they'd seen me in days.

Stabbing at the numbers on my phone I rang Jane immediately, I didn't even have to tell her what was wrong, she already knew.

'Edward' she tried to calm me with a soothing voice, 'We'll release a statement to the papers straight away denying the claims and pointing out that her bump indicates she is much further along that she could possibly be if it was your child, seeing as you only met her recently. It will be difficult, people won't believe you but when the baby is born, a paternity test will prove it.'

I was seething so much I could barely speak, I manage to grunt out a 'yes' to her and then slammed the phone down.

I had to see Bella, as soon as possible. If I was quick, maybe she wouldn't have seen it, maybe she'll never know. I couldn't let her be put under any stress, I needed her, and my baby, she was having my baby.

I got into the car and drove as fast as I could, reaching her door in a matter of minutes. I jumped out of the car, not bothering to lock it and slammed the house door open, striding past Charlie who was already protesting, and into Bella's room.

Bella was already awake, sitting up in bed, with the magazine open on her lap.

****

I really hope you enjoyed it, I'm trying my best to get back into the groove but any suggestions would be good.

**Review please, I need to know where I'm heading.**

**Thank you :)**


	33. I Know

**Forgive me!**

**I know it's been such a long time but I promise I'll try be more regular with updates from now on.**

**And I think it's time to cut down on the angst as well, God knows what realistic relationship would have survived all this.**

**I want to be be able to reply to your reviews but for the life of me I can't work out how! feel free to give advice!**

**Epov**

"Bella" I started to say, almost stumbling over my words to protest my innocence.

Looking at her I realised her face was a picture of pure calm. The tears and stress I had expected were nowhere to be seen and for that I was eternally grateful.

And then she spoke, the first time I had heard her voice for weeks, and the soft words that came tumbling out of her mouth were enough to set my head spinning, my emotions in turmoil.

"I know Edward, I know" she whispered, her voice cracking with emotion.

What did she know?

Was she saying she knew it wasn't true?

Or was she saying she 'knew' I had got another girl pregnant?

Before I could ask her she held her arms out to me.

Sitting there, propped up in her bed looking as tiny and fragile as a child, she wordlessly called me over, beseeching me with her soulful dark eyes.

I crossed the room in a matter of strides and scooping her up, pulled her to me.

Weakened as she was, her skin was still creamy and as soft as silk and the warm honey smell emanated from her.

I held her close, unsure of what to do next, I didn't want to push her but neither did I want to let her go again.

Gently I placed her back on the bed but she clung to me, unwilling to let me go.

"Stay with me Edward, hold me, please, we need to talk " she whispered, her little voice music to my ears.

Climbing into bed with her I rested her back against my chest and wrapped my arms around her, enveloping her, fearful she would try and run from me, but she didn't.

And then she began to talk.

**Bpov**

Alice and Rosalie had been my rocks these past few weeks, caring for me and comforting me.

I loved my dad but he just didn't know what to do, it was times like this I needed my mum, but at least I had my girlfriends to take care of me.

I had resigned myself to the fact that Edward was going to leave me, going to return to England, and I told myself that I was alright with that, that I had a little bit of him forever.

But I wasn't.

I needed him as much as I need air to breathe, he was the oxygen in my lungs and without him I was in pain.

I knew he had been here over the weeks, he must only have come when I was sleeping because I never saw him, but when I woke often the room was filled with his scent and that was the greatest source of comfort to me of all.

Alice and Rose had been filling me in on everything I'd missed whilst I had been gone. The words they spoke about Edward, his actions towards me, the constant fear and devotion he seemed to hold for me brought tears to my eyes.

I understood why he had acted the way he did, and they told me he understood why I had run from him but yet I had continued to push him away.

It was time, I decided, to let love back in.

Alice had rung me as soon as she had seen the article about that skank claiming she was pregnant with Edward's baby, reassuring me that none of it was true, and warning me that as soon as Edward found out he would no doubt insist on seeing me, and I believed her.

Reading through it myself I was almost amused at the relationship this woman had created in her mind, but the amusement was not enough to override the anger I felt at her for using my Edward.

My Edward.

And I was having his baby.

We were having our baby, and I hoped with all my heart that we could be a family.

I heard the door slam as he banged through it and chuckled at the weak protests my father gave him, trying to stop him charging into my room, and then he was there.

"Bella" he breathed out.

He was beautiful and the wave of love I felt for him washed over me as I sat and looked at him for a moment, trying to think of the right words to say.

"I know" that was the best I could come up with? Well that didn't mean anything!

I held my arms out to him, wanting to feel him close, his warm body against mine.

He seemed unsure at first but the took me in his arms, holding me tight.

As he made to let go I clung on and insisted he got into bed with me and uttered those age old words that everyone fears to hear.

"We need to talk"

With his body pressed warm against me, I relaxed into him, feeling calm and safe and began.

I explained all my fears and worries of him leaving me and not wanting me or the baby, I told all that Rose and Alice had relayed to me and all they had done for me. I explained why I'd run, why I was fearful, that I knew this woman was lying about his baby. I told him how I believed him, I trusted him, I loved him, more than anything, irrevocably.

And then I lay there in his arms, listening to the steady beating of his heard and feeling his warm, sweet breath on me, waiting to hear him talk.

**Epov**

She thought I didn't want her.

That I didn't want the baby.

How?

This tiny woman laying in my arms, carrying my child, meant more to me than anything in the world.

I was entirely at her command, anything she asked of me I would try and provide, I would give anything up for her.

Lowering one hand to rest on her swollen stomach I used the other to turn her chin towards me and caught her lips in mine.

I tried to put everything I felt into that kiss and it was soft and sweet, my tongue washing over her lip as it sought entrance into her mouth as she lifted her arms around my head and pulled my in closer.

Pulling away I looked into her eyes and saw the tears shining there, knowing she could see the exact same thing in mine.

"I love you Bella, more than everything, more than anything. You've given everything to me, your love, your kindness, you've even given me a child and I thank you, you are my love and my life"

She smiled softly at me and at the moment I couldn't resist any longer. I needed her forever, I had to try and make sure she would never run from me again and she knew just how much I loved her.

With no planning, no getting down on one knee, with no ring I looked at her beautiful face and whispered "Please Bella, marry me"

The tears that had been shining in her eyes now spilled gently down her cheeks, her smile widening as she pulled my face down to kiss me again.

As I gathered her in my arms I felt her moan "Yes" into my mouth, and with that I was undone and my own tears matched hers as they chased down my cheeks.

**I hope hope hope you like!**

**Too soon with the proposal do you think?**

**Do any of you have any interesting proposal stories you wanna tell me?**

**Review please **


	34. Time is fleeting

**Happy Halloween!**

**I hope you're all having a good time with your friends and families : ) **

**I hope you enjoy!**

**Epov**

The next couple of months just about washed away all the pain of past events, in a way they brought Bella and I closer together, we'd both learnt not to make quick assumptions and that had brought us to trust more deeply and discuss situations a lot more.

The first few weeks had been tentative, Alice, Rose, Jasper and Em had all been thrilled for us but Bella's dad and her old friends had had a lot more reservations. They didn't know me and they didn't trust me in any way. Of course, they knew me by reputation and that made things even worse, the idea that I was being constantly linked to chains of different women, especially in the last few weeks whilst Bella had been laying there ill with them watching over her, caring for her, and I couldn't blame them.

It was all I could do to try and convince them I hadn't been with Tanya or Jessica whilst the girl I professed to love had been knocking on death's door and I was making the most concerned effort to toe the line. I asked Charlie for his permission to marry his daughter and agreed to follow curfew whilst Bella was still living under his roof. I wanted to prove to them, and to Bella that I was here to stay, that there would be no more running from now on.

Whilst I still had to work on the film, me and Bella had limited time to see each other but we utilised the time we did have as best we could, going out on dates together, behaving as if we were teenagers again, watching movies and making out in the dark. It was funny, in a way, that after spending time with my fiancée, the mother of my child, I had to return her to her father at the end of the night; it was if we were starting out again from scratch but with a guaranteed goal of a wedding and a baby at the end of it. It was different, but I liked it, and Bella liked being able to spend time with her father seeing as she would be returning to England with me as soon as production was over.

Only a few people had been told about our engagement, we wanted to keep it on the down low as much as possible whilst I was in America because if word got out before I was back in England, the media would be very difficult to control and no doubt Jane would kill me for dumping loads of extra work on her.

Alice had been beside herself when we'd told her, squealing like a little girl and grasping at Bella's hands, shouting about all the things they were going to do together in preparation, even as we saw the group of at the airport, a week before we returned home Alice had been clutching bundles of wedding magazines whilst dictating to Rosalie the things they would need to gather for the hen do.

As production drew to a close I helped Bella gather all her things together and left her to say her heartfelt goodbyes to her father and her friends with guarantees of wedding invitations and baby photos. I had developed a trusting, if slightly tentative relationship with Charlie by this time and I privately invited him over to stay in one of my houses whenever he wanted so he could be around Bella as much as he pleased, I had a feeling she was really going to want his comforting steadiness around the time our baby was born.

Our baby.

A little shock of happiness burst through me each time I thought about the little life growing inside of Bella, the image of the ever expanding soft curve of her creamy white stomach thrilled me.

I had spent hours each night thinking about it, what the baby would look like, whether it would be like me or Bella, what we should call it, what we would dress it in, although I doubt we'd get much choice in that last matter because I knew for a fact that Alice had been researching ambiguous baby clothes since the second we'd found out we were having a baby and was desperate for us to find out the sex of the baby as soon as possible, although she'd vetoed pink and blue baby clothes, saying they were far to cliché for her niece or nephew.

I know a lot of people wouldn't expect me to spend my nights thinking of such things and would probably think less of me if they knew I did. I was Edward Cullen, movie star, I was supposed to be cold and unfeeling, getting my kicks by fucking a different whore every night but what can I say? Those days were over and I was excited. And anyway, what else was I supposed to think about when Bella was still sleeping at her dad's house instead of warming my bed?

I chartered a private jet to take me and Bella home back to England, unwilling to wait for a commercial flight or to have to be stuck in cramped little seats with everyone staring and whispering. I knew Bella was going to miss America and I felt a little pull at my heart when I realised I was taking her away from her family for my own selfish gain but I reasoned I'd make it up to her. I was definitely going to miss her little American twang she had rediscovered though if she swapped back to an English accent. I'd only heard it briefly in the past when she'd been angry and yelling at me, though I hadn't mentioned it because I didn't think she realised she was using it, but it managed to couple cute and sexy together very well and what can I say? We're always after something a little bit different!

I had been so grateful for the private jet on the flight back home, it'd given us the privacy we'd been denied so long and we spent most of the way back promising to ignore the past and look forward to our future together. The last hour or so, Bella had fallen asleep and I pulled her onto my lap, cradling her and brushing my lips over her forehead whilst laying a hand on her stomach. The steady rhythm of her heart beat was soothing and lulled me into a deep peace where I was able to just relax and enjoy her company after so long apart, knowing now what I'd have missed if I had lost her forever. I could never lose her again; it would finally break me completely.

When we had returned to my apartment the first thing I did was move all of Bella's things into my bedroom. It felt complete in a way, I gave her free reign to change anything else in the house and add in all her bits of furniture that she had put into storage and she had happily complied to an extent, nothing major but making sure there was an essence of Bella in every room you walked into, a painting or a photograph, just  
something to recognise her.

After a week back we'd settled down again, booked a scan for our baby and released a statement saying I was with Bella and she was pregnant and we were very happy together.

We allowed a bit of pomp and circumstance in announcing our engagement, instead of just releasing a press statement saying we were engaged, I wanted to do it properly, make it special for Bella.

Alice took me shopping for the perfect engagement ring for her, trawling round different jewellery stores for hours until I finally spotted one I knew was right; a two carat princess cut diamond with smaller diamonds on either side, so pure and beautiful, reflecting my own ideas about my future wife. Hiding the ring away in my jacket, I waited for the perfect sunny day to take Bella out for lunch in London. We sat outside at the restaurant in the sunshine and laughed and talked whilst we enjoyed our meal as a string quartet played inside the restaurant, creating the perfect ambience for what I was about to do.

As I heard the strings strike up and start to play Charles Aznavour's '_She'_, I knew that was my cue. With silence falling around us, I dropped to my knee in front of Bella and presented her with the ring and the words "My life began when I met you and I don't want it ever to end, marry me." I'll admit there was one heart stopping moment when I panicked that she'd say no, even though we were already technically engaged, but to my relief she allowed me to slip the ring onto her finger and then wrapped her arms around my neck saying yes, as the cameras of the ever following paparazzi flashed around us, capturing the moment for the world to see and remember.

Things seemed to have started to fall back into place with my life, I was with my friends and my fiancée, my baby was on its way and we were happy.

I have to give a big thanks to Pauleen who thought up the proposal idea : )

**I'm not hugely happy with this chapter as it seems that everything and nothing have happened all at once but it means I can speed things along a little now, pull out of the angst and get back into the romance with the wedding and the baby.**

**Can somebody please tell me how to answer reviews? I just can't figure it out and I really am grateful for all of them : )**

**So, should the baby be a boy or a girl? Or should there be a surprise waiting for them at their scan?**

**I hope you enjoyed it.**

**Please review : )**


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